Sunday, January 06, 2013

The Worst Wedding, Ever

By Mona Goldwater, Manners and Mores Editor



I've been to some strange weddings over the years, but none matches what happened at the Princess Maria Vittoria del Pozzo della Cisterna's marriage to Amadeo (sometimes written Amedeo), duke of Aosta (and son of the king of Italy) on May 30th, 1867. On the day of Princess Maria and Duke Amadeo's wedding:

  • Her page (e.g., wardrobe mistress) hanged herself.

  • The gatekeeper of the palace where the wedding took place, slit his throat (possibly because he was in love with the page?). Slitting your own throat cannot be a cakewalk. But the gatekeeper did it, successfully.

  • The Colonel who led the wedding procession, collapsed with a "sun stroke," or heat exhaustion, and died.

  • After the marriage ceremony, the station manager was crushed beneath the wheels of the honeymoon train as it was leaving.

  • One of the king's advisers fell off his horse and died immediately.

  • The best man, presumably after witnessing all of this f**ked up stuff, shot himself.

  • Not long after the marriage ceremony, The Princess discovered her new husband was a degenerate philanderer with an eye for the gals. When she complained to his dad, the King of Italy, the King told her to pound sand.

Three years after this series of tragic events, Amadeo was elected the King of Spain. But Spain was so factionalized that he was unable to muster popular support, and his rule was punctuated by violent uprisings by and among the various warring political factions. He abdicated the Spanish throne in 1873 and went back to Italy. Maria della Cisterna died three years later, nine years after their disastrous wedding.
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