Wednesday, August 30, 2006

A salute to Radio Shack for innovation in firing 400 workers. . .by email

RadioShack Corp. notified around 400 workers by e-mail yesterday that they were being fired immediately.

Employees at the Fort Worth headquarters received messages Tuesday morning saying: "The work force reduction notification is currently in progress. Unfortunately, your position is one that has been eliminated." The Associated Press story can be found here. All This Is That salutes the innovators at RadioShack Corp. who made this process almost pain-free for the managers and winged monkeys whose duty might have been to look those employees in the eye as they were "letting them go."

Tuesday, August 29, 2006

The Devil made them do it says The Vatican. Hitler and Stalin were possessed by Satan.

According to The Vatican's chief exorcist, a/k/a 'caster out of demons,' Adolf Hitler and Russian leader Josef Stalin were possessed by the Devil. Father Gabriele Amorth , Pope Benedict XVI's Chief Exorcist made his comments during a radio interview.

"Of course the Devil exists and he can not only possess a single person but also groups and entire populations.

"I am convinced," Father Amorth said, "that the Nazis were all possessed. All you have to do is think about what Hitler - and Stalin did. "

"That's why we need to defend society from demons."

According to recently released and long-time secret Vatican documents, the wartime Pope, Pius XII attempted a telepathic exorcism on The Fuhrer, which was never successful.

A Daily Mail article published yesterday evening made this curious relevation.

President Bush performs encore of his Katrina song from one year ago, and as to the cleanup of New Orleans, declares "Mission Accomplished!"

Today, on the anniversary of the Hurricane Katrina landfall, President Bush reprised the same song he performed last year, and declared that the rebuilding of New Orleans and Mississippi was complete. He made a call to his old confederate "Brownie," reminiscing about the heady days last August and September when The President, in concert with F.E.M.A., hit the ground running and practically beat the hurricane to New Orleans, with a massive supply airlift, logistical support, and engineers. According to The President, the operation was nearly flawless.

Jesus: The Missing Years--John Prine's take on Jesus's missing 27 years

Between the ages of 12 and29, Jesus Christ fell off the map. No one knows (or ever wrote about) where he was or what he did. The Bible does not tell us where he was or what happened to him for those long 17 years...

A lot of people have theories on The Missing Years. This is John Prine's:

Jesus.... the missing years
by John Prine

It was raining. it was cold
West bethlehem was no place for a twelve year old
So he packed his bags and he headed out
To find out what the worlds about
He went to france. he went to spain
He found love. he found pain.
He found stores so he started to shop
But he had no money so he got in trouble with a cop
Kids in trouble with the cops
From israel didnt have no home
So he cut his hair and moved to rome
It was there he met his irish bride
And they rented a flat on the lower east side of rome...
Italy that is
Music publishers, book binders, Bible belters, money changers,
Spoon benders and lots of pretty italian chicks.

Charley bought some popcorn
Billy bought a car
Someone almost bought the farm
But they didnt go that far
Things shut down at midnight
At least around here they do
Cause we all reside down the block
Inside at ....23 skidoo.

Wine was flowing so were beers
So jesus found his missing years
So he went to a dance and said this dont move me
He hiked up his pants and he went to a movie
On his thirteenth birthday he saw rebel without a cause
He went straight on home and invented santa claus
Who gave him a gift and he responded in kind
He gave the gift of love and went out of his mind
You see him and the wife wasnt getting along
So he took out his guitar and he wrote a song
Called the dove of love fell off the perch
But he couldnt get divorced in the catholic church
At least not back then anyhow
Jesus was a good guy he didnt need this shit
So he took a pill with a bag of peanuts and
A coca-cola and he swallowed it.
He discovered the beatles
And he recorded with the stones
Once he even opened up a three-way package
In southern california for old george jones

Repeat chorus:

The years went by like sweet little days
With babies crying pork chops and beaujolais
When he woke up he was seventeen
The world was angry. the world was mean.
Why the man down the street and the kid on the stoop
All agreed that life stank. all the world smelled like poop
Baby poop that is ..the worst kind
So he grew his hair long and thew away his comb
And headed back to jerusalem to find mom, dad and home
But when he got there the cupboard was bare
Except for an old black man with a fishing rod
He said whatcha gonna be when you grow up?
Jesus said god
Oh my god, what have I gotten myself into?
Im a human corkscrew and all my wine is blood
Theyre gonna kill me mama. they dont like me bud.
So jesus went to heaven and he went there awful quick
All them people killed him and he wasnt even sick
So come and gather around me my contemporary peers
And Ill tell you all the story of
Jesus...the missing years

Repeat chorus:

We all reside down the block
Inside at ....23 skidoo.

Are you a psychopath? Take the psychopathy test.

Are you a psychopath? Take the psychopathy test. Remember. . .no cheating, although if you are indeed a psychopath, you would have no compunction about cheating.

Robert Hare's Psychopathy Checklist-Revised is the psycho-diagnostic tool most commonly used to assess Psychopathy.

Disclaimer: Your scores may have important consequences for your future, and this test should only be considered valid if administered by a qualified and experienced clinician under controlled conditions. As a life-long student and observer of abnormal psychology, I am emminently qualified to administer the test (further disclaimer: I would also consider myself qualified to perform surgery, having carved a few birds and beasts over the years). And what could be a more controlled environment than All This Is That?

Psychopathy Checklist-Revised

This is a clinical rating scale contains 20 items. Each item is scored on a three-point (0, 1, 2) scale according to specific criteria through file information and a semi-structured interview. A value of 0 is assigned if the item does not apply, 1 if it applies somewhat, and 2 if it fully applies. The items are as follows:

1 Glibness/superficial charm
2 Grandiose sense of self-worth
3 Need for stimulation/proneness to boredom
4 Pathological lying
5 Conning/manipulative
6 Lack of remorse or guilt
7 Shallow affect
8 Callous/lack of empathy
9 Parasitic lifestyle
10 Poor behavioral controls
11 Promiscuous sexual behavior
12 Early behavioral problems
13 Lack of realistic, long-term goals
14 Impulsivity
15 Irresponsibility
16 Failure to accept responsibility for own actions
17 Many short-term marital relationships
18 Juvenile delinquency
19 Revocation of conditional release
20 Criminal versatility

The cutoff for psychopathy is 30 points or greater, although some studies recommend 25. If you scored even over 10, I'm not saying you're ready for the rubber room at the laughing academy, but I'm not sure I want to have you, say, babysit my children either.

Monday, August 28, 2006

Dumb as a board? Try smarter than 98% of the people reading this. Paris Hilton is outed as a genius and Mensa member.

A family member close to Paris Hilton revealed to All This Is That yesterday that Ms. Hilton is a member of Mensa. Contrary to the image she has carefully developed over the last several years, Paris Hilton has an I.Q. of 144, and is in the top 1% of the population in I.Q.

"It's one of the best-kept secrets in the world," the source told us, "and probably the last thing she wants known." Ms. Hilton joined Mensa in 1997, at the urging of her parents, when she was 16 years old. The family had known about her intelligence for many years, and finally, urged her to take the Mensa qualification test. She had already racked up stratospheric scores on I.Q. tests taken during her early school years and easily passed the Mensa qualification test.

Mensa was founded in England in 1946 by Roland Berrill, and Dr. Lance Ware to create a society for bright people, with the only qualification for membership being a high IQ. They hoped to create a utopian group that was non-political and free from racial and religious distinctions. The society includes members from every walk of life whose IQ is in the top 2% of the population.

Paris Hilton is an American actress, fashion model, author and singer. Her rise to fame was as an heiress to the Hilton Hotel fortune, as well as of her father's, real estate fortune. She was skyrocketed to fame (infamy?) when a videotape of her having sex with her boyfriend became public on the internet. The video drew attention to her participation in a reality T.V. series, The Simple Life. That was followed by a series of personal scandals and publicity stunts. The notoriety enabled Ms. Hilton to publish books, release a music CD, and to launch a best-selling perfume, among other ventures.

Our source told us "She has basically shucked the public into thinking she was a hopeless airhead when in fact, she is a cynical manipulator and entrepreneur. She does nothing that is not calculated and scripted to enhance the image of the mornonic blonde skank. You know what she raked in off just her perfume this year? It's worked pretty well. Don't you think?"

Friday, August 25, 2006

Wally Wood's 22 panels that work

Wallace "Wally" Wood was an American comic book writer, artist and independent publisher mostly remembered for his work in EC Comics and Mad Magazine. He was born in 1927, and took his own life in his mid-fifties, in 1981.

He created hundreds of comic book pages and illustrated books and periodicals, as well as working in advertising, commercial design, product illustration, gag cartoons (I'm thinking of those risque little cocktail napkins from days of yore), and record album covers and posters.

He also worked on those fantastic Topps "Mars Attacks" trading cards.

Below, is a reasonably high-res. scan of his "22 panels that always work." He apparently created this as some sort of primer for others (and a reminder to himself). He described the panels as a primer, "interesting ways to get some variety into those boring panels where some dumb writer has a bunch of lame characters sitting around and talking for page after page."

click to enlarge, right click to save

A lot of his lessons seem to apply across the board--not only to comic illustration, but to easel art, trad. animation, and digital art--the whole tamale.

It's a little unclear who actually released this scan...BoingBoing says is the guy. He says he recently purchased the original very cheaply. He has some really high res scans on his site.

Poem: Anger management is a slippery slope

click angry Jesus to enlarge

I keep worrying
That anger management
Is a slippery slope

In the march toward
Political Correctness
And the next thing you know

We'll be managing laughter
Because people not laughing feel left out
Or because there's so much to cry about

That laughter trivializes the anguish
And leads to the day
When horseplay clowning and japery

Are forbidden forms of expression
And the universal hand-wringing

Thursday, August 24, 2006

Digital painting: a self-portrait -- something of a Chuck Close Experiment

Click image to enlarge

This is something of a Chuck Close experiment in painting. The portrait on the left is composed entirely of hundreds of mini-mes, colored and shaded differently. The portrait on the right is the portrait on the left, drastically shrunken and softened. Below is the photo I used for a starting point. I blew this picture up and replaced blocks of pixels with the shaded "mini-me" images.

the original source photo (left) and a detail of the painting (rigtht)

Wednesday, August 23, 2006

Alien Lore No. 87 - The Greys at Roswell

I will not go into a lot of detail here. . . check out the links below to learn more about Roswell. I mostly just wanted to publish this picture:

click to enlarge

Celebrities on Roswell
Cheney, Bush & The Greys
Alien Bodies in possession of the U.S. government
Ronald Reagan,. Steven Spielberg, The Greys, & Roswell
The Roswell Flying Saucer and Alien Autopsy
The Alien Interview
Presidents (And Near Presidents) Who Believe In Or Have Seen UFOs: Carter, Nixon, Reagan, Ford, Goldwater, Truman

Happy 60th Birthday Bill Clinton

The youngest President ever to leave office under his own power turns 60 years old today. Happy Birthday, Bill!

He was an inspiring President (if you discount a few rather tawdry and indecorous episodes). A warm man, and a great speaker, he can light up a room like no one in that office has since JFK. I have only seen him in a large crowd, but people I know who've been at gatherings say he is even more mesmerising in smaller venues. He avoided war, and balanced the budget (and began paying down the deficit). His politics, personality, and deep bond with the American people only shine brighter the longer his successor remains in office.

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

Poem: Changes 15/The Armies Of The Night

The fifteenth hexagram of the I-ching says
It is favorable
To set armies marching

To chastise
One's own city
And one's own country

And I wonder what happened
To those Armies Of The Night
That marched in the 60's

And ended the war
And how hard it might be
To do it again

Just one more time
As Tessio said
For old times' sake.

Identikit drawing of Del Brummet

OK. I'm still no good at this (maybe this would be close enough to nab Del on the lam) but I think I can figure it out eventually. Identikit drawing of Del Brummet created with Faces 3.0.

Montage of two nearly fifty year olds

Click image to enlarge.

As it turns out, I couldn't use this montage because the evite I am working on won't support large images.

Monday, August 21, 2006

Former President George H.W. Bush excoriates his son's war

The "First Family" is rumored to have suffered an irreparable rift. More precisely, the rift between the former and current President George Bush has grown into a Grand Canyon-sized chasm. Sources told All This Is That that former President George George (aka POTUS 41) recently told another former President, William Jefferson Clinton (aka POTUS 42), "Bill, we ran the wrong brother for President. I feel terrible."

The former President continued, "What really chaps my hide is that this gigantic mess he's gotten us into is somehow perceived as making amends for my Presidency. For some mistake I made. Sure, I made mistakes. But does an even bigger one somehow even the score?"

"Look," Bill Clinton said, "George. . .no one blames you for any of this. It is his war. Most of us know you had nothing to do with it." "But there is this perception, Bill, " George H.W. Bush explained, "That I somehow didn't finish the job. Or finish it right. And look at the mess he has gotten us into." "I mean it George," Bill Clinton explained, "No one holds you responsible." "Maybe not," George Bush said, "but the f**king idiot has done nothing for my legacy, except hurt it, believe me. . ."

"Let's face it, Bill. You whipped my ass over these mistakes. (And that jughead Ross Perot didn't help either). I accept that. I like you. We're friends. That was politics. But what my son has done is inexcusable. It's wrong. It's hurting our country. And he has broken my heart. And he's done it with Rummy and Cheney and these other folks I trusted and cared about. I don't even talk to the boy anymore. We see him on holidays. I don't even know if I can keep doing that. The whole thing just makes me sick."

All This Is That earlier reported on the rift in the first family in its formative stages: click here.

Other recent All This Is That reportage on George Bush (43):

President George Bush 'channels' Adolph Hitler during Iowa speech ...
The Declaration of Independence & Parallels between King George ...
President Bush and the origins of the "you rock/devil horns" sign
Painting: President George W.Bush does a face plant on the world ...
"I would love to kill George Bush"
George Bush & the Geometry problem
Alien Lore No. 65 - George Bush, Dick Cheney & The Greys
President Bush condemns bilingual national anthem
President Bush: "Bush, Clinton, Bush, Clinton"
President Bush lights up the "c***suckers" in the press
President angrily refuses to accept Veep Cheney's resignation ...
Sex Pictures Of President Bush, President Chirac, And Queen Elizabeth
President George W. Bush Speaks About Universal Values
All This Is That -
Best President Bush quotes of 2005
The lies the President told in his State of the Union & his real ...

Sunday, August 20, 2006

Mudballs, or hikaru dorodango

Hikaru dorodango are balls of mud, formed by hand into perfect spheres, and then polished to a brand-new-bowling ball gloss. "The process is simple, but the result makes it seem like alchemy." It does.

Mud? These things are incredible!

Dorodango was a traditional pastime among the Japanese children. No one seems to know where it came from. The tradition was dying out until Professor Fumio Kayo developed a simple technique for creating dorodango. It's now hip, and booming.

The dorodango above is by Bruce Gardner --click on his name to see his interesting site. He has created some wonderful dorodango. And he even gives you detailed information on how to make your own.

Digital Painting: Send in the clowns

Click the clown to enlarge. This isn't really all that shocking an image
when you consider how many people have a true phobia/fear/
dislike of clowns.

I found this on the internet about ten years ago. It is usually called Bill The Clown. It still exists on a couple of sites, but no one seems to know who created it in the first place. If it was you, let All This Is That know!

Painting: self-portrait

click to enlarge

Saturday, August 19, 2006

Painting: Dave Hokit and Jack on the mountain top

click Dave and Jack to enlarge

Poem: The Tenth Planet (Or An Incredible Facsimile?)

click on this image of the tenth planet to enlarge...

Is it a planet or not?
It depends on
What it's orbiting around.

A planet must orbit a star.
Round objects floating freely
Through space don't count.

If an object orbits a much larger object
That is not a star
Then it's not a planet either.

Scientists are slated to announce
Very soon whether or not that rock
Floating out there is the tenth planet

Or not.
If it isn't
Then what?

The tenth planet on All This Is That

Friday, August 18, 2006

Save the animals!


Jerry Garcia Lives!

Jerry in Seattle, May, 1995. Click to enlarge.

Jerry at an unknown venue in the spring or
summer of 1995. Click to enlarge.

Once again, the anniversary of Jerry Garcia's death has come and gone. Eleven years gone. In that eleven years I have attended many shows and concerts and none have come close to generating the thrill I felt every time I walked into a Grateful Dead show. In the photograph on top, he looks sweet, wise, and angelic. The Seattle shows of 1995 are widely regarded as some of the Dead's best during the 90s. They were good.

Jerry in Seattle, 1995, the last time I saw him perform.
Other select links on All This Is That:
Jerry's toilet for sale
Jerry Garcia 1942-1995
Ten years without the Dead

Thursday, August 17, 2006

Alien Lore No. 86 - Humans can be tasty!

Humans have proven themselves adaptive to sudden change, and quite tasty as well. Our little blue ball has become something of a cosmic Colonel Sanders for wayfaring aliens.

Our crunchy goodness is one reason why there's been a huge UFO cover up, or so the lore goes. Aliens with a taste for man flesh (not unlike Orcs) are enroute to earth in a spaceship that looks like an asteroid (click here to read All This Is That on this spaceship, sometimes referred to as the tenth planet). Fortunately, we first heard from various Greys who had flown to earth to warn us about the invasion (ala Klaatu in The Day The Earth Stood Still. The greys also furnished the D.O.D. with incredible technology. The catch: the government agreed to let the greys occasionally harvest some people. The greys, were genetically bankrupt, and needed to create hybrids to survive. They need our DNA.

Your average citizen isn't going to stand for government-approved kidnappings. The blowback from other plots shows we average imbeciles don't really understand the lengths our government must go to protect national security. We haven't risen in some mighty Revolt of the Knuckleheads. But we could.

The aliens left a hostage with the United States as a pledge of fulfillment of their part of the agreement. That hostage Grey was named Krill. He wrote The Krill Papers.

I quote from The Krill Papers:

"How the actual contact between the government and aliens was initially made is not known, but the government was made aware that it could be done by a civilian using the right equipment. Dr. Paul Bennewitz, civilian scientist, did so using computer equipment and informed the government he had done so, not realizing that by then, in 1983, that the government was in truth as deep into dealing with the aliens as his communications with them revealed. Dr. Bennewitz lives next to Manzano Weapons Storage Area in Albuquerque, New Mexico. He observed UFOs constantly over the area and initially decided that they were a threat to the installation. He proceeded to figure out a coding system and attempted and was successful in communicating with the aliens that were flying over that area. What he found out is that after initial contacts with the aliens years ago, we agreed to to provide them with bases underground in the United States in return for certain technological secrets which the aliens would reveal to us. The aliens would also be allowed to carry out certain operations, abductions, and mutilations without intervention.

"We knew that the Greys were instrumental in performing the mutilations of animals (and some humans) and that they were using the glanular substances derived from these materials for food (absorbed through the skin) and to clone more Greys in their underground laboratories. The government was also aware that the Greys performed some of the abductions to secure genetic materials. The government insisted that the Greys provide them with a list that would be presented to the National Security Council.

"The government thought that the Greys were basically tolerable creatures, although a bit distasteful. They presumed at the time that it was not unreasonable to assume that the public would and could get used to their presence. Between 1968 and 1969 a plan was formulated to make the public aware of their existence over the succeeding twenty years. This time period would culminate with a series of documentaries that would explain the history and intentions of the Greys. The Greys assured us that the real purpose of the abductions was for monitoring of our civilization, and when we learned that the abductions were a lot more frequent and insidious than we were led to believe, the government became concerned.

"By the time we had found out the truth about the intentions of the Greys (they intend to stay here and stay in control of our world) it was too late. We had already "sold out" humanity. Not that it would have made any difference, because they were here doing what they were doing anyway.


Wednesday, August 16, 2006

Poem: Don't look back

Don't look back
Means no regrets

Look back on the good times
But leave the rest

Just ask Lot's wife
And the other pillars of salt

Standing outside Gomorrah
Like Easter Island statues

Tuesday, August 15, 2006

Veep Dick Cheney threatens to resign (again)

The President and Vice-President following their Monday afternoon
meeting. Click to enlarge.

Between meetings at the White House with the Defense Department and a bill signing ceremony for H.R. 5683, the President and Vice President met briefly yesterday afternoon. The Vice-President was tense, according to a source within the White House, who leaked a transcript of their conversation to All This Is That.

The Vice President had recently been pressing for a meeting. Cheney was fuming by the time they had their sitdown.

"I am sick and tired of being hidden in the closet," Cheney opened.

"Dick. Dick. You gotta understand. I don't even have to say this. . .you know the kind of heat we're under," replied The President.

"Then turn me loose. I can help this you know."

"Damnit! You've seen your f***ing negatives! The best way you can help us now is to work behind the scenes."

"With all due respect, Mr. President, I've had it right up to here with behind the scenes. After all I've done for this country, after all I've done for you, to be stifled like this is wrong. Do you think we'd be where we are today if I just sat on my hands the last six years?"

"Dick Dick Dick. I give you plenty of latitude. But you forget who the President is. "

"Now that's not true at all Mr. President. "

"There's a reason you never ran for President. They just don't like you. They may not like me so much right now, but they'll come around. But the last thing we need is for you to take the cork out. For Christ Sake! We have the elections coming up in less than three months. Do you really think turning you loose is going to help us there? We lose this election as bad as some people seem to think, lame duck doesn't even begin to describe what the scene around here will be. This Presidency will be castrated. And where is that going to get either of us? We need to start thinking about our legacy."

"So my options, Mr. President, are stay in the closet or walk away?"

"And now, you're going to start the resignation s**t again?!"

"If that's what it takes, yes. I'm not going to spend the next two years sitting around here like a potted plant."

"Then resign. But you won't. This is your last whirl on the carousel. If you walk away, you'll be remembered as the guy who walked away. Is that what you've worked for? Yeah, we've back-burnered you! So what!? What choice do I have? I've had it with all this bullcrap about you being the shadow President. It's time people know who's running the show. And it's not like we're out of the woods on this whole f***ing Scooter Libby mess either! When's the other shoe gonna drop on that one?"

"You're dead wrong, George, if you think I'm worried about my "legacy." Who are you f***ing kidding? You know how many VPs make the history books? Christ! Humphrey, Rockefeller, Garner, Mondale, Wallace, Barkley! Who knows these guys were Vice President? I'll bet you don't even f***ing know who Barkley was! Or how about Charles Dawes! Gimme a f***ing break. This legacy doesn't mean s**t! Damnit! Garner s
aid the Vice Presidency wasn't worth a pitcher of warm spit. He wasn't wrong, by the way. I have half a mind to throw in the towel tomorrow. Who needs this crap? Read your history. . .the only Vice Presidents we remember are those whose Presidents were plugged or resigned!"

"You do what you gotta do. I'll put someone in and give them a leg up in in the election."

The transcript breaks off at this point when their meeting was interrupted for a previously scheduled briefing with Secretary Rumsfeld and the Defense Policy and Programs Team.

"Let's just say it was another Mexican standoff," the White House aide told All This Is That. "Cheney threatens to quit every few months. What was strikingly different this time, is that The President said 'go ahead.' It wasn't long ago that Cheney's threats would send the President into crippling panic attacks. Those days are over. "

*All This Is That* Poster

Click Poster To Enlarge

Monday, August 14, 2006

Identikit Fun - A composite drawing of Hitler

Click one of the Hitlers to enlarge

A few years ago, for a research project, I purchased a copy of Faces 3.0 (by Interquest), a program mainly used by law enforcement. Unfortunately, they no longer sell the program to the general public. I suspect, of course, you could probably snag a copy on Ebay or somewhere a little more shady. . .

Every once in a while I break it out and noodle with it. I admit, I'm not so good at it. Believe it or not, even with 100 sets of eyes, and the ability to size them and move them apart, closer, up, or down, it's hard to get it right. The program has around 4,000 unique facial features. I can look at my drawing of Hitler and see dozens of things wrong. The eyes aren't right, the eyebrows are as close as I could get, I couldn't get his head square enough, and the moustache is too neat. I could go in and Photoshop [tm] the drawing and fix a lot of this. Aging is difficult as well--it never seems like the folds and wrinkles and blemishes work the way I want. But it's a fun problem to have.

They include a fun game with the software where they flash a suspect's face for a couple of seconds and then you work to recreate the face in Faces 3.0. I'll do a few more over the next while...and put them on All This Is That...

Monkeying Around With Fido

A Youtube link to a simian prankster. You have to admit, our cousin seems to be doing this for the prank value alone. Curious George lives! Watch the video here.

Sunday, August 13, 2006

A few of the lies I heard and told this week

We found the bad bugs.
I'll send the money tomorrow.
I'm fine.
I won't do that again.
I'm from Verizon and I'm calling to help you. . .
I'll do it tomorrow.
True story; a friend of my friend was there.
Now we're even.
The software will ship on time.
You look great.
We're calling because we know you are as angry as we are about. . .
For your convenience. . .
In order to serve you better. . .
New and Improved!
You're right Jack.
Trust me.
I'll never get that drunk again.
That was special.

Saturday, August 12, 2006

Airline passenger restrictions, hip replacements, and why the Executive Branch goes unmolested, while I am scanned, probed, poked and patted down

Cory Doctorow wrote the following in a post on BoingBoing today:

"It seems to me like our glorious leaders are pretty good at setting out the "minor inconveniences" that the rest of us have to put up with, but when was the last time you heard of any of them enduring the same measures?

Now, GW Bush may say, "But I'm no terrorist! Why shouldn't I be able to bring my hip-flask onto Air Force One with me?" But I'm no terrorist either. I don't see why the man should be exempt from his own rules. If it's sauce for the goose, it's sauce for the butcher. "

Since I have had arthoplasty surgery and own an artificial hip, I get to experience a close-up and personal shakedown every single time I ride an airplane (and twice, or more, if it is not a non-stop flight). Anyone who knows me could tell you I am the least likely candidate in the world to take down an airplane, due to a nearly maniacal fear of flying. And I do have to resent--just a little--the fact that people I consider deranged like The Vice-President, and Secretary of Defense, get to walk right onto their 'planes entirely unmolested.

I will admit that everyone who has examined me has been both professional and friendly, and even appreciative that I am sanguine about the whole operation. It's hard to get mad at them. . .they're earning $16 an hour the hard way. I have never met one of these guys who wasn't extremely nice. I watch other people become angry over the invasion, but it's really not worth the oxygen. As usual, the big problems lie further up the food chain. I don't mind the searches, but as this week's events in England show, this may not be making us as safe as we once thought.

And now, we take it to the next level. No more liquids or iPods or computers or phones in the passenger cabin.