Speaker of the House John Boehner on the brink: An All This Is That Editorial Twofer by Fanque and Brummet

Pablo Fanque (National Affairs Editor):

As he began sensing an Egyptian-style revolt from his newly-emboldened and newly-elected colleagues of the Tea Party-persuasion who intend to increase--no, double--the spending cuts this year, Speaker John Boehner threw his juggernaut into reverse and said no, I never agreed to any specific numbers with President Obama.  

Smelling blood in the water after Boehner's weaseling, Harry Reid and Chuck Schumer in the Senate rallied Democrats and charged that The Speaker was afraid of his own party's "Tea Party extremists."   Sure, Boehner has said he agrees with the Draconian reductions advocated by House Budget Chairman Paul Ryan, but Ryan himself admitted his proposal may well leave his party's flanks open to political assault as the Democrats get their act together and recover from their shellacking in November. 

It seems highly likely that The Speaker will not emerge from this fracas whole.  On the other hand, the majority of his party realize they are walking through a mine field and may well come to their senses and turn their backs on their deranged colleagues.  We will know in the next day or two. Good luck, Mister Speaker!

Weeper of the House Boehner with Ex-Speaker Nancy Pelosi

Jack Brummet (Arts, Paranormal, and Satire Editor):

SOTH John Boehner is either facing his eminent downfall, or if the winds blow just right, a massive consolidation of power.  He has, unfortunately (for him) been unable to keep his friends close and his enemies closer. [1]  In particular he has had difficulty with his enemies, who are not Democrats, but the Tea Party wingnuts of his own Grand Old Party.  He has to feel a little bit like Damocles right about now. 

Damocles was in the entourage in the court of Dionysius II of Syracuse. Sucking up to Dionysius one night, Damocles went on and on about how fortunate he was to be a great man of power, sitting in the cat-bird seat, surrounded by opulence.  Dionysius called him out.  He offered to switch places so that, he too, could enjoy that great fortune.  Damocles eagerly accepted the King's offer, sat down in the throne and prepared to party on.  But wily Dionysius had arranged for a massive sword to to be hung over the throne, suspended by a single hair of a horse's tail wrapped around the sword's pommel.  Damocles was unable to ever really enjoy the wine, women, and song because he could never stop thinking about that sword.  He soon begged Dionysius to switch back, because he no longer wanted to be so fortunate.  I am pretty sure not an hour that goes by that John Boehner doesn't wish Ex-Speaker Pelosi was sitting in the seat he was so eager to own.

[1] The phrase "keep your friends close and your enemies closer" is usually attributed to Sun-tzu, the Chinese general and author of the brilliant Art of War. But, there is no documented history of this. It was actually first said by Michael Corleone in The Godfather Part II.

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