---o0o---
Saturday, March 17, 2012
Friday, March 16, 2012
Faces No. 277
By Jack Brummet
[charcoal, Sharpie, and acrylic on 7 1/2" x 29" wood panel]
[charcoal, Sharpie, and acrylic on 7 1/2" x 29" wood panel]
click to enlarge
---o0o---
Thursday, March 15, 2012
Faces No. 275 - 23 faces on a file folder
Drawing by Jack Brummet
[100% analog - Sharpie on manila file folder, 17 1/4"x 22 1/2"]
[100% analog - Sharpie on manila file folder, 17 1/4"x 22 1/2"]
click to enlarge
---o0o---
Drivers describe their accidents for an insurance company
By Jack Brummet, Folklore Editor
The following excerpts come from a Toronto insurance company's records of drivers' descriptions of their accidents. Allegedly. Snopes.com calls this list's authenticity "undertermined." I've had this list for about ten years. Snopes researched and wrote about the list last in March, 2011. No. 20 is almost poetry. . .
1. The pedestrian had no idea which direction to go, so I ran over him.
2. The other car collided with mine without giving warning of its intentions.
3. I thought my window was down, but I found it was up when I put my hand through it.
4. I collided with a stationary truck coming the other way.
5. A truck backed through my windshield into my wife's face.
6. A pedestrian hit me and went under my car.
7. The guy was all over the road. I had to swerve a number of times before I hit him.
8. I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law, and headed over the embankment.
9. In my attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole.
10. I had been shopping for plants all day and was on my way home. As I reached an intersection, a hedge sprang up obscuring my vision. I did not see the other car.
11. I had been driving my car for forty years when I fell asleep at the wheel and had the accident.
12. I was on my way to the doctor's with rear end trouble when my universal joint gave way, causing me to have an accident.
13. As I approached the intersection, a stop sign suddenly appeared in a place where no stop sign had ever appeared before. I was unable to stop in time to avoid the accident.
14. To avoid hitting the front bumper of the car in front, I struck the pedestrian.
15. My car was legally parked as it backed into the other vehicle.
16. An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my vehicle and vanished.
17. I told the police that I was not injured, but on removing my hat, I found that I had a fractured skull.
18. I was sure that the old fellow would never make it to the other side of the roadway when I struck him.
19. Coming home, I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I don't have.
20. I saw the slow moving, sad-faced old gentleman as he bounced off the hood of my car.
The following excerpts come from a Toronto insurance company's records of drivers' descriptions of their accidents. Allegedly. Snopes.com calls this list's authenticity "undertermined." I've had this list for about ten years. Snopes researched and wrote about the list last in March, 2011. No. 20 is almost poetry. . .
2. The other car collided with mine without giving warning of its intentions.
3. I thought my window was down, but I found it was up when I put my hand through it.
4. I collided with a stationary truck coming the other way.
5. A truck backed through my windshield into my wife's face.
6. A pedestrian hit me and went under my car.
7. The guy was all over the road. I had to swerve a number of times before I hit him.
8. I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law, and headed over the embankment.
9. In my attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole.
10. I had been shopping for plants all day and was on my way home. As I reached an intersection, a hedge sprang up obscuring my vision. I did not see the other car.
11. I had been driving my car for forty years when I fell asleep at the wheel and had the accident.
12. I was on my way to the doctor's with rear end trouble when my universal joint gave way, causing me to have an accident.
13. As I approached the intersection, a stop sign suddenly appeared in a place where no stop sign had ever appeared before. I was unable to stop in time to avoid the accident.
14. To avoid hitting the front bumper of the car in front, I struck the pedestrian.
15. My car was legally parked as it backed into the other vehicle.
16. An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my vehicle and vanished.
17. I told the police that I was not injured, but on removing my hat, I found that I had a fractured skull.
18. I was sure that the old fellow would never make it to the other side of the roadway when I struck him.
19. Coming home, I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I don't have.
20. I saw the slow moving, sad-faced old gentleman as he bounced off the hood of my car.
---o0o---
Rick Santorum: "I've got such a raging clue right now"
This captioned photo, source unknown (or maybe the quickmeme.com guys actually did create it), was sent to us by Jeff Clinton. /Pablo
---o0o---
In the face of mounting calls for his withdrawal, Speaker Gingrich vows to stay the course
By Pablo Fanque, National Affairs Editor
illustration by Jack Brummet
"We are staying in this race because I believe it's going to be impossible for a moderate to win."
Following his shellacking in Alabama and Mississippi yesterday, Speaker Gingrich held a rally today in a Chicago suburb. 75 people showed up.
illustration by Jack Brummet
"We are staying in this race because I believe it's going to be impossible for a moderate to win."
Following his shellacking in Alabama and Mississippi yesterday, Speaker Gingrich held a rally today in a Chicago suburb. 75 people showed up.
---o0o---
Wednesday, March 14, 2012
Poem: Stop-loss
Stop-loss
By Jack Brummet
We can't slow back down
And run twice as fast
To keep up
While electric plantations hum 24/7
In Bayonne, Shanghai, Richmond, Tacoma,
Manteca, South San Francisco, Pittsburgh,
Flint, Bombay, Long Beach, and Cleveland.
Expressways and boulevards
Skein an incipient skull orchard.
We are caught in flagrante delicto, with our pants down
And hands wedged in the cookie jar.
No one dares to finger or be fingered
As mother earth struggles
To free herself
From the shackles.
She turns off the rain
And takes back her Dodos and Whales,
Snail Darters and Spotted Owls,
Pygmy Hippotami and Flightless Cormorant,
Vancouver Island Marmot and Gavial,
Great Auk and Wild Ass,
Tapir Kagu and Manatee,
Carolina Parakeet and Dire Wolf,
Coelacanth and Blackfooted Ferret,
Snow Leopard and Przewalski's Horse,
Glaciers, rain forests, and monkey flower,
Bigleaf Scurfpea and Spiny Rice,
Interrupted Brome and Greensword.
The infidels have battle fatigue
And sing the song we know so well:
I don't believe in earth. I just believe in me.
---o0o---
Claire Brummet: return to India
By Jack Brummet
My daughter Claire returned to India for a long visit in February. Her first month was spent at an ashram, as she studied and trained for her yoga teacher certification. She is now living in an apartment on top of a mountain, trading English lessons for food, and meeting lots of folks. She is keeping a mostly photo-blog on Tumblr: http://clairebrummet.tumblr.com/
"I have graduated from yoga school and am roaming around India. I am following in the footsteps of my father and trying to blog about my trip. Welcome to my wacky world of drinking 5 rupee chai's, dodging piles of cow poop, bargaining for everything and avoiding auto-rickshaw
All This Is That contains copyrighted material the use of which has not always been specifically authorized by the copyright owner. We make these materials available to advance the understanding of political, economic, literary, artistic, and social issues. In some cases we satirize, parody, or lampoon materials from other sources. We believe this constitutes a 'fair use' of copyrighted material as provided for by section 107 of the US Copyright Law. In accordance with Title 17 U.S.C. Section 107, the material on this site is distributed without profit for research, educational, and entertainment purposes. If you wish to use copyrighted material from this site for purposes of your own that go beyond 'fair use', please read and follow our Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 license and attribute the work to All This Is That, along with our URL (http://jackbrummet.blogspot.com).
My daughter Claire returned to India for a long visit in February. Her first month was spent at an ashram, as she studied and trained for her yoga teacher certification. She is now living in an apartment on top of a mountain, trading English lessons for food, and meeting lots of folks. She is keeping a mostly photo-blog on Tumblr: http://clairebrummet.tumblr.com/
"I have graduated from yoga school and am roaming around India. I am following in the footsteps of my father and trying to blog about my trip. Welcome to my wacky world of drinking 5 rupee chai's, dodging piles of cow poop, bargaining for everything and avoiding auto-rickshaw
Claire with her teacher on graduation day
"Me and Vishva and Chetena’s daughter, the amazing 5 year old Uma."
Claire with a guest yoga teacher--who is 104 years old "This is an old friend of Vishva’s and he came to teach our 6am class one day during the course. He is 104 and still going strong on the yoga tip. His name is Yogananda. One of the memorable pieces of wisdom he left us with was “Milk silent killer”.
Graduation Day - that's Claire in the front row, second from the right
---o0o---
All This Is That contains copyrighted material the use of which has not always been specifically authorized by the copyright owner. We make these materials available to advance the understanding of political, economic, literary, artistic, and social issues. In some cases we satirize, parody, or lampoon materials from other sources. We believe this constitutes a 'fair use' of copyrighted material as provided for by section 107 of the US Copyright Law. In accordance with Title 17 U.S.C. Section 107, the material on this site is distributed without profit for research, educational, and entertainment purposes. If you wish to use copyrighted material from this site for purposes of your own that go beyond 'fair use', please read and follow our Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 license and attribute the work to All This Is That, along with our URL (http://jackbrummet.blogspot.com).
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)