Wednesday, April 19, 2006

Secretary Donald Rumsfeld arrested, reportedly taken to the laughing academy



In a bizarre incident at The White House Tueday afternoon, Secretary Donald Rumsfeld was taken into custody and has reportedly been placed in a secure government mental health treatment facility in Maryland. The incident occurred at around 4:30 EDT.

According to sources in The Administration, Rumsfeld arrived at The West Wing and demanded to speak with President George W. Bush. The Secretary was refused entrance by the new Chief Of Staff, Joshua B. Bolten. A shouting match ensued in which Donald Rumsfeld accused the Chief Of Staff of cutting him off. "This is not what The President would want! I won't be shoved aside by some pissant bureaucrat!" Rumsfeld shouted as he charged past office workers and attempted to break down the doors to the Oval Office.

White House security, summoned by Bolten, were on the scene within seconds, and took the Secretary into custody. He was ushered into a government S.U.V., and taken to a, thus far, undisclosed location. The White House press office refused comment on the incident, saying the incident would be discussed in the morning's press briefing.
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