In a stunning about face, Vice-President Dick Cheney today announced that he would seek his own term as President of the United States. Making his announcement with his wife Lynne at his side, the Vice-President promised that in one additional term he would be able to implement the programs the Bush Administration had to set aside in order to wage war. "We haven't come as far as we'd hoped. With your help, I intend to get us there."
In the surprise speech to the Cheyenne, Wyoming Daughters of the American Revolution, Cheney said he would cut taxes even further, while strengthening the military, and "finally cleaning up the Social Security mess."
The Vice-President also announced that he would continue and widen the war on terror. "We have them on the run now," Mr. Cheney said, "and I promise you, we will kill or capture the leaders of Al Quaeda as well as Osama bin Laden."
Other potential Republican and Democratic candidates had no comment on Cheney's announcement other than to say "we are utterly stunned and in disbelief."
One campaign chief on the G.O.P. side said "This is wrong on so many levels. Wait until tomorrow when the floodgates have opened." Another Democratic political operative guessed "On the face of it, this seems like a really sick joke. We could see Cheney withdraw from this race as soon as next week. When it comes, the blowback on this one will be nothing like we've seen this crazy year so far."
Several would-be Republican candidates already have press conferences scheduled for tomorrow morning.
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4 comments:
For my part, I'd welcome Cheney as President (although the best scenario would be that he replaces bush due to scandal or cessation of life). Wasn't it Tiberius who told people that by choosing Caligula as his heir that it would mean the end of Imperial Rome. Would a Cheney presidenct NEUTER the GOP for years and years?
Your parodies or whatever fucking suck. Quit posting them to fark. Farkers suck enough om their own...
Do you post comments on your own blog?
I post comments when people ask me questions. . .like this.
It would be easier for me to not comment on something and just write a post...the tools are better and there is no challenge to type the magic phrase.
So, the answer is yes. . .but in my own name.
I mean you, anonymous, could be me and I could responding to myself.
But what would be the point? This isn't goinbg to generate traffic or something.
In the end, this is a weird question! JACK
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