Showing posts with label 2012 Election. Show all posts
Showing posts with label 2012 Election. Show all posts

Thursday, August 07, 2014

My New Dick — Sarah Palin channels a President

[ATIT reheated, from five years ago]

By Pablo Fanque, National Affairs Editor
Illustrations by Jack Brummet, All This Is That Arts and Letters Editor

On July 3, 2009, Governor Sarah Palin announced that she would not run for re-election in the 2010 Alaska election and would resign by the end of the month. Palin stated that since August 2008, she and the state had been expending an "insane" amount of time and money ($2.5 million) responding to "opposition research", 150 Freedom of Information Act requests and 15 "frivolous" legal ethics complaints filed by "political operatives" against her. 

As I watched Palin's strangely jangled and jittery "resignation speech" last week, I was reminded of another speech--Richard Nixon's famous "last press conference" after losing the 1962 Governor's race in California (to Jerry Brown's dad no less). Not unlike Sarah Palin, the press rode Dick pretty hard, put him away wet, and eventually he came a little unglued. The night of his gubernatorial trouncing, he listened to his bitter staffers, and finally snapped. He went out to give his concession speech. It was a rambling sixteen minute affair tinged with bitterness toward the press and his critics. Sound familiar?


"I leave you gentleman now and you will write it. You will interpret it. That's your right. But as I leave you I want you to know — just think how much you're going to be missing. You won't have Nixon to kick around any more, because, gentlemen, this is my last press conference. . ."
Dick Nixon had been called a user car salesman, red baiter, Ike's lapdog and all the rest. Sarah Palin, after the rogering she received from the press in the election, and following the final, staggering blow of last week's savage Vanity Fair article, and the unending lawsuits and investigations, decided to throw in the towel. On this chapter. Palin resigned as Governor and, like Nixon, did not talk about the future. But keep your eyes peeled. She is running, and resigning from office will only enable her to run stronger, faster, and harder. Like it or not, Sarah Palin has a base. And all it takes to become President is building on that base. Remaining as governor would not help build that base; staying in office will only lead to further diminution of her reputation. Now she needs to do her homework, start campaigning for other politicians, mend fences, collect I.O.U.s, travel, give speeches, and begin nipping at Mitt Romney's bootheels.




The media is wrong. Sarah is making the smart move. Jimmy Carter came out of nowhere (well, Georgia) with no base and far less name recognition. And he got to the big seat, trouncing a sitting President. Palin needs major rehab to her damaged political image--the damage caused by media and liberals, and most importantly, her self-inflicted wounds.

Soon to be Ex-Governor Palin will have to go to war with the Republican Establishment. She can easily best the Band of Clowns left to defend the blown husk of the G.O.P.

Compare Nixon's speech -- Listen to the audio of Nixon's infamous speech via the History Channel -- to the Palin resignation speech:






Dick Nixon was elected President of the United States of America exactly six years after his "last press conference."

[Ed's note] Paul Constant wrote in The Stranger on July 29 2014 that "She's a political figure who has spent every last dime of political capital that she earned through her half-term as governor of Alaska and as a failed vice presidential candidate. Politically, she's washed up. She has no power. Nobody who works in Washington, DC, owes her favors. Her fan base has shrunk to a few hundred thousand unfettered loons, meaning she doesn't even have the ability to promote change through petition or boycott anymore...."
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Tuesday, October 22, 2013

ATIT Reheated: The GOP/Tea Party March To 2012—an army of pinheads, charlatans, mountebanks, narcissists, and third-rate grifters

By Pablo Fanque, National Affairs Editor
and Jack Brummet, Social Mores Editor

[reprinted from ATIT, December 30, 2010] 

The GOP Presidential candidates are charging out like clowns from a clown-car.  Of course, getting in to The Show early, or even just announcing, is pretty cheap.  And it increases your cash flow, your paid trips, marketability, and even perceived gravitas.  Democrats on the other hand are holding back.  To declare against a sitting President is generally an exercise in futility and, at times, a near-suicidal political act.  However, strong candidates have pulled it off (most notably Bobby Kennedy, whom we did not get to see go the distance) and won roles at the convention, and promises of plum diplomatic jobs or cabinet positions. 

Jeb Bush - who knows what he'll do?


Congressman Pence

Politico reports the House Republican Conference Chairman from Indiana is considering stepping down from his GOP leadership post to prepare for a possible presidential run in 2012. 'Though the 2010 mid-term election is just barely over, the pressure is on Pence and other GOP hopefuls to state their intentions.

Ex-Governor Romney

Mitt Romney has already been running for a couple of years, really ever since the night he conceded to John McCain during the primaries.  He seems to us like one of the more plausible candidates to whom Democrats might defect (maybe his biggest appeal to Dems and most horrifying to GOP/Tea Party members is the pretty excellent health care system that he pushed for in Mass.).   We think his religion is no roadblock.  Yeah, we don't think a Hari Krishna will become president soon, but a Mormon?  Sure, why not?  We are fine with a Jewish or Moslem president, but don't think that happens anytime soon.

Ex-Governor Huckabee

Ex-Governor Mike Huckabee won the Iowa primaries last time around, had a huge buzz...and for a few weeks, he was the "It Guy," appearing on the cover of Newsweek, and was the focus of numerous political talk shows. He may or may not run.  He seems to like his current FOX news gig. [Ed's Note: nearly half of the GOP hopefuls and toe-dippers are on the FOX payroll in some form or another.]



Ex-Speaker (and architect of the Contract On America) Gingrich (painting by Jack Brummet)

Newt Gingrich, another FOX hack. . .who knows? We guess he will indeed run.  Newt is a guy who craves the limelight.

Governor Pawlenty

Tim Pawlenty could be running...he is visiting several key, early primary states.  He has a book out.  He was maybe Number Two on McCain's VP list.  But alas, he has a personality like shirt cardboard.   His Q factor is virtually zero.


John Bolton

John Bolton, the neocon diplomat (and former undersecretary of state) has publicly toyed with the idea.  He may jump in for a primary or two if he can get enough of his fat cat friends to pony up enough cash to make a short, respectable run. 

Guvnah Barbour

Haley Barbour, the (once) well-thought of Governor may have killed his changes recently with racially insensitive--no, inflammatory--remarks on how nice the south was back in "the good old days."


Senator Thune

John Thune, who, a few years ago, stomped Democratic powerhouse Tom Daschle in South Dakota, is textbook politically handsome.  And like Tim Pawlenty. . .about as exciting as yesterday's oatmeal.

Governor Daniels

Mitch Daniels (Governor of Indiana) dismissed a presidential run in June 2009, saying "I've only ever run for or held one office. It's the last one I'm going to hold."   In February 2010 he told a Washington Post reporter that he was open to the idea of running in 2012. 



The Donald

Donald Trump has made some noise about making a Presidential run.  It's hard to see how a national joke could get much traction in Iowa or New Hampshire.

Ex-Governor Palin (painting by Jack Brummet)

Sarah Palin.   She's certainly open to the idea--if not the reality--of running for President.  If she does make a go of it, it will be fascinating watching her in those early primaries.

Ex-Senator Santorum

Rick Santorum, the former Pennsylvania Senator who was obliterated in the 2006 election, may just be tempted to run.  Another FOX guy.  He is almost in the national joke category, along with Trump.  He is probably best known for his positions on the U.S. invasion of Iraq, Social Security, intelligent design, homosexuality, and the long-forgotten Terri Schiavo case.




Governor Christie (painting by Jack Brummet)

Chris Christie--a guy we think could go all the way.  He's a Republican who is seen by his own party as soft on immigration; is against gay marriage, but in favor of civil unions (just like President Obama!); is not strong with the pro-gun lobby; favors medical marijuana; and while opposed to it, is soft on abortion and doesn't believe it is the state's duty to ram it down the throats of the people.   However, the Tea Party wing of the party does not take a blue dog approach.  You're either with them, or against them.  With all the other neo-con and tea-party alternatives, it's hard to see how Christie could ever garner much support within his own party.
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Friday, March 23, 2012

Ex-Senator Rick Santorum endorses President Barack Obama: I love this guy!

By Pablo Fanque, National Affairs Editor 





 


Ex-Senator Rick Santorum said yesterday that Romney is so much like Obama, voters in November should just  stick with the incumbent.  In Texas, the candidate once again held up front-runner Mittens as the Etch A Sketch candidate, who will change his positions after the primary.  


"You win by giving people a choice," he said. "You win by giving people the opportunity to see a different vision for our country, not someone who's just going to be a little different than the person in there. If you're going to be a little different, we might as well stay with what we have instead of taking a risk with what may be the Etch A Sketch candidate of the future."  I effing love this guy!




Romney's top political strategist suggested that Ex-Senator Santorum's continued presence in the race makes him President Obama's "most valuable player."   
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Friday, February 10, 2012

Pants on fire: Mitt Romney tells another whopper today

by Jack Brummet, primary and caucus stringer


“I am the only candidate in this race, Republican or Democrat, who has never worked a day in Washington,” Mitt Romney said in a speech today.  “I don’t have old scores to settle or decades of cloakroom deals to defend.”

Mitt has plenty of deals to defend.  Just this week, he said he'd a been a fool not to look for Federal money.  Today, in The Morning Call, Colby Itkowitz writes:  "In a 2003 article in Boston-based Commonwealth Magazine, Romney’s chief of legislative and intergovernmental affairs, Cindy Gillespie, discussed the state’s Washington lobbying office and is quoted saying it “exists for one reason: to increase the amount of federal funding coming back to the state.”


In the same Commonwealth article, Gillespie says Romney’s team in Washington would seek aid from the federal highway bill and new homeland security funds.  Of course, Romney also fought hard for (and won) federal funding for his Big Dig project in Boston.
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Monday, January 09, 2012

Newt nails down the coveted Todd Palin endorsement

By Pablo Fanque, National Affairs Editor


Ex-Speaker Newt Gingrich has secured the coveted endorsement of Todd Palin.  The Ex-Governor's husband told ABC news today that the Gingrich campaign has “burst out of the political arena and touched many Americans.”


Todd Palin, known as the "First Dude" during his wife's term of office, didn't have anything negative to say about the other Republican Presidential candidates, but that his "hat is off to everyone” in the race.

Palin's wife Sarah has yet to endorse any of the candidates for President.
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Sunday, January 08, 2012

Have you ever had sex with Rick Perry?

By Mona Goldwater, Social Mores Editor



The answer to the question in the display ad in the Austin Chronicle turns out to be no.  At least no one has come forward since this ad was posted last August, just after Governor Rick Perry entered the Presidential contest.  The advertiser *may* have had some takers had they, as Larry Flynt has in the past, offered a significant sum of cash for the story. [Ed's note: the advertiser is a Ron Paul supporter.]




At the time the advertisement appeared, publications like Salon duly noted the appearance of the ad, but also said  there is no evidence Perry has ever engaged in an extra-marital affair, as much as his opponents and the left wanted to believe otherwise.  The text in the ad reads, "Are you a stripper, an escort, or just a 'young hottie' impressed by an arrogant, entitled governor of Texas? Contact CASH [Committee Against Sexual Hypocrisy], and we will help you publicize your direct dealings with a Christian-buzzwords-spouting, 'family values' hypocrite and fraud."
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Thursday, January 05, 2012

John McCain's recent endorsement of, and his thoughts on, Mitt Romney in 2008

By Pablo Fanque, National Affairs Editor
illustration by Jack Brummet



Although Senator John McCain endorsed Mitt Romney in his quest for the presidency yesterday, this is a new position  for him.   Wednesday's McCain-Romney event was a rather stiff affair, and seemed to stop well short of a heart-felt embrace of Romney.  The endorsement was a one-hand-washes-the-other/quid pro quo arrangement for Romney's 2008 endorsement. The only thing missing is John McCain holding his nose and crossing his fingers. . .

In 2008, Senator McCain had a different take on Mittens:


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Friday, December 30, 2011

Iowa Republican Caucus Contestants: Huntsman, Bachmann, Gingrich, Romney, Perry, Santorum, and Paul

Illustrations by Jack Brummet, except Newt Gingrich No. 2 (Artist unknown)             

The Govnah

Ron Paul

Newt One

Newt Two


Newt Three

The Hunt

Santo


Hotlips Bachmann


Mittens
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Tuesday, November 29, 2011

A friend in good weather and foul: Senator Lori Klein's spirited (and twisted) defense of Herm Cain

By Pablo Fanque, National Affairs Editor

Thanks to Kristopher Skelton, who passed this along after someone passed it along to him.  Salon today reported that Arizona State Senator Lori Klein (and Herm Cain's AZ campaign chair) has mounted a spirited defense of skirt-chasing serial-groping Pizza Man. 

"not unattractive" AZ State Senator Lori Klein

"Lori Klein, an Arizona state Senator and Cain’s Arizona state chairman, told CBS News she stands by Cain."

"Says she has known him for 12 years and he’s “never been anything but a gentlemen – and I am not an unattractive woman.”


Klein also told CBS News that if Cain is innocent he should sue White for libel.  Like Herm himself, she also went on the attack against the media for ferreting this out.  She said that, in politics, “we want a virgin to do a hooker’s job.”

This reminds me of Herman Cain's earlier attempt at defending his actions, where he essentially said "OK, you have these four women raising a ruckus.  But what about the 300 million Americans who I haven't harassed?"

I strongly suspect we'll see HC bow out of the race on Thursday or Friday.
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Tuesday, November 15, 2011

BHO may skip traditional ads and just "run clips of the Republican debates"



President Obama recently told Univision News that his re-election campaign won't require any attack ads or mud-slinging.

“We may just run clips of the Republican debates verbatim,” he told the Spanish TV network. “We won’t even comment on them, we’ll just run those in a loop.”
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Friday, November 04, 2011

The Republican-Tea Party: a new Presidential candidate with a serious resume

By Pablo Fanque, National Affairs Editor

The G.O.P. has finally rolled out the one Republican candidate that I could possibly support, and vote for.

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Wednesday, August 31, 2011

George Clooney affirms he is not and will not be running for President

By Pablo Fanque, National Affairs Editor

George Clooney said today that he will not be running for the office of President of the United States, now or in the future. 

This is no surprise to us. The actor, in February, told Newsweek that he "did too many drugs" to ever seek office.  "I f***ed too many chicks and did too many drugs, and that’s the truth."

He may play a dirty presidential candidate in the upcoming drama "The Ides of March," but in real life the actor would never dream of running for office.  "I didn't live my life in the right way for politics," he said when he was approached by the California Democratic Party. 

A savvy politician, Clooney said, "would start from the beginning by saying, 'I did it all. I drank the bong water. Now let's talk about issues,'" said Clooney. "That’s gonna be my campaign slogan: 'I drank the bong water'?"
Clooney's new political thriller--Ides of March--comes out next month, with George playing a Presidential candidate who doesn't hesitate to get into the gutter.  Working on that movie did not infect him with the necessary lust, ambition, and madness to run for national office. 

"As for running for president, look, there's a guy in office right now who is smarter than almost anyone you know, who's nicer and who has more compassion than almost anyone you know. And he's having an almost impossible time governing. Why would anybody volunteer for that job?," Clooney told reporters at the Venice Film Festival, according to the Associated Press.


As you probably know, George Clooney has spent some time over the years with President Obama, and was friends with him during his years in the Senate.  He met The President last year to talk about what he saw on a trip to the Sudan.

“I have a really good job,” he said, "I have no interest."
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Saturday, May 28, 2011

The Republican-Tea Party Catapults Rudy Giuliani into first place

By Pablo Fanque
All This Is That National Affairs Editor


This is a mind-f***er of all mind-f***ers!  In the jangled, early scramble for the GOP Presidential nomination, seemingly out of nowhere, Rudy Giuliani has suddenly--and barely--become the front runner!  He's hardly even said he was thinking of running.  But somehow the withdrawals of Huckabee, Crist, and Trump, not to mention the near total collapse of the Newt Gingrich "campaign" have catapulted Crazy Rudy to the top of the rockpile.  Who knows what next week's polls will show, now that Sarah Palin's actions indicate she is about to leap in?

But Rudy?  Have the Republican-Tea Party voters forgotten how quickly his candidacy self-immolated last time around?

The results of the current CNN poll (Gingrich didn't even clear 10% this time):

Giuliani 16%
Romney 15%
Palin      13%
Paul       10%

The poll has a 4.5% margin of error...in short, these "front-runners" are all basically in a dead-heat for first place.
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Thursday, March 24, 2011

End times edge closer: the Tea Party's Michele Bachmann forms "exploratory committee"

By Pablo Fanque
National Affairs Editor
Illustration by Jack Brummet




Representative Michele Bachmann, is currently spending a week tromping around Iowa, which will hold the first caucuses of the 2012 Presidential race.   Her team just leaked to CNN that said Bachmann will form an exploratory committee in June.  She also named an Iowa state senator-- Kent Sorenson--as her political director in the early caucus state.

She recently told ABC's Jonathan Karl that "I'm in for 2012 in that I want to be a part of the conversation in making sure that President Obama only serves one term, not two, because I want to make sure that we get someone who's going to be making the country work again. That's what I'm in for. But I haven't made a decision yet to announce, obviously, if I'm a candidate or not..."
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Wednesday, March 16, 2011

SoS Hillary Clinton will not remain in office if Obama is re-elected

By Pablo Fanque, National Affairs Editor
Illustration by Jack Brummet

In an interview with CNN's Wolf Blitzer, Secretary of State Hillary Clinton said that she would complete her term as SoS, but would not serve again should The President be re-elected.  She also told Blitzer she would not run for either Vice-President or President.

Fascinating.  I think if she wanted to make a run for President, she could probably come as close as last time.  And if Obama for some reason does not run, it seems like she would be the front runner, and would end up #Winning!  And, on top of that, I think she's been a very good Secretary of State.



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