The Lake of Fire: a very short tale

By Jack Brummet [source: unknown]

A man died and found himself in limbo, waiting in a long line for judgment.

The man saw that some souls were allowed to march right through the pearly gates. Others were led over to Satan, who threw them into a lake of fire. Every so often, instead of hurling a condemned soul into the lake of fire, Satan would toss him or her off to one side.

After watching Satan do this several times, the men's curiosity got the better of him. He strolled over The Great Deceiver.

"Excuse me, there, Your Darkness," he said. "I'm waiting in line for judgment, and I couldn't help wondering why you toss some people off to the side instead of flinging them into the fires of hell with the others?"

"Ah," Satan said with a grin. "Those people are from Seattle. I'm just letting them dry out so they'll burn."

---o0o---

The Lake Of Fire

A man died and found himself in limbo, waiting in a long, long line for judgment. He noticed that some souls were allowed to march right through the pearly gates. Others were led over to Satan, who threw them into a lake of fire. Every so often, instead of hurling a condemned soul into the lake of fire, Satan would toss him or her off to one side.

After watching Satan do this several times, the men's curiosity got the better of him. He strolled over The Great Deceiver:+

"Excuse me, there, Your Darkness," he said. "I'm waiting in line for judgment, and I couldn't help wondering why you toss some people off to the side instead of flinging them into the fires of hell with the others?"

"Ah," Satan said with a grin. "Those people are from Seattle. I'm just letting them dry out so they'll burn."
---o0o---

Poem: When the devil comes knocking

"It's for you. I think it's The Devil."

I always wondered when
And how he would come knocking—

Maybe in a two-button Armani suit
Or clad in a red unitard

With a baffle for his tail—
And ask me why I blame him

For the ills in our hearts and world.
Will he flip open a dusty,

Bartleby-scriven ledger
And call me to account

For my good deeds,
Or did he come to claim me

For the accumulation
Of a succession of transgressions?

Does he realize I have a problem
With authority figures?

When The Devil comes knocking
Will he show up half-drunk

And reeking of sulphur
Or will he come in stealth

Looking polished and rakish
Like George Clooney or George Raft?

Will he proffer a Faustian deal?
Or is he coming because I earned

My passage into the underworld
The hard way, sin by sin

And he's nearly an innocent bystander
Just collecting the bill?
---o0o---