Drawing: Faces 2261 ― Waiting for the next stall at the baseball game

by Jack Brummet

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Painting: Faces 2117 — The Eighth Inning

by Jack Brummet

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Orioles to play White Sox in an empty Camden Yards tomorrow

By Jack Brummet

This has to be a first, right? Camden Yards empty? It's strange, and makes me think of the tree falling in the lonely forest. Is it really a baseball game with no fans to see it?

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The foul-mouthed baseball players of 1897

By Pablo Fanque, Sports Editor

This letter was found in 2007 in the papers of the baseball historian Al Kermish, who was also a baseball ephemera collector.   The memo contains so many raunchy quotes that the league declared it "unmailable" via the post office, and was thus hand-delivered to the league's twelve ball clubs.  

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SPECIAL INSTRUCTIONS TO PLAYERS

In a contest between two leading clubs during the championship season of 1897, the stands being crowded with patrons of the game, a gentleman occupying a seat in the front row near the players' bench, asked one of the visiting players who was going to pitch for them. The player made no reply. He then asked a second time. The gentleman, his wife who sat with him, and others of both sexes, within hearing distance, were outraged upon hearing the player reply in a loud, brutal tone, "Oh, go fuck yourself."

On being remonstrated with by his fellow-players, who told him there were ladies present, he retorted he didn't give a damn, that they had no business there anyhow.

This shocking indecency was brought to the attention of the League at the Philadelphia meeting in November, 1897, and a committee was appointed to report upon this baseball crime, define and suggest for it a remedy.

In response to nearly one hundred communications addressed to umpires, managers and club officials, soliciting definite, positive and personal knowledge of obscene and indecent language upon the ball field, the committee received a deluge of information that was so appalling as to be almost beyond belief, showing conclusively and beyond contradiction that there was urgent need for legislative action on the part of the League.

That such brutal language as "You cock-sucking son of a bitch!" "You prick-eating bastard!" "You cunt-lapping dog!" "Kiss my ass, you son of a bitch!" "A dog must have fucked your mother when she made you!" "I fucked your mother, you sister, your wife!" "I'll make you suck my ass!" "You cock-sucker!" and many other revolting terms are used by a limited number of players to intimidate umpires and opposing players, and are promiscuously used upon the ball field, is vouched for by the almost unanimous assertion of those invited to speak, and who are competent to speak from personal knowledge. Whether it be the language quoted above, or some other indecent and infamous invention of depravity, the League is pledged to remove it from the ball field, whether it necessitates the removal of the offender for a day or for all time. Any indecent or obscene word, sentence, or expression, unfit for print or the human ear, whether mentioned in these instructions or not, is contemplated under the law and within its intent and meaning, and will be dealt with without fear or favor when the fact is established by conclusive proof.

By Order of the Committee.

[UNMAILABLE. Must be forwarded by Express]

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The DeMerits

Getting to meet, and cook dinner for, Sooz's parents was awesome. I'd never spent time with a baseball player from the bigs before (John DeMerit played with the Mets and Braves with Hank Aaron and Warren Spahn the year they won the World Series). He had some great stories. And both of them were complete sweethearts (photo on my/Susan DeMerit's page).  This night also confirmed what I've always felt about my friends from the middle of the country:  salt of the earth.

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Doc Ellis's LSD-fueled no-hitter for the Pittsburgh Pirates

Doc, back then

Thanks to bro-in-law Dean Ericksen for pointing out this fantastic animation of Doc Ellis's amazing LSD-fueled no-hitter. Doc was interviewed not long before he died, and the creators used his hilarious shaggy-dog narrative to create their cool flash piece.

"Sadly, the great Dock Ellis died last December at 63. A year before, radio producers Donnell Alexander and Neille Ilel, had recorded an interview with Ellis in which the former Pirate right hander gave a moment by moment account of June 12, 1970, the day he no-hit the San Diego Padres. Alexander and Ilels original four minute piece appeared March 29, 2008 on NPRs Weekend America. When we stumbled across that piece this past June, Blagden and Isenberg were inspired to create a short animated film around the original audio."


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A broken pine-tar covered bat comes flying into the stands. What do you do?

A broken pine-tar covered bat comes flying into the stands. What do you do? You put up your arms in hopes of deflecting it. This photograph is an interesting study in crowd reflex.


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Happy 161st Birthday Baseball!

The first baseball game played under the modern rules (also known as the Knickerbocker Rules) occurred in 1846. And Just what were these modern rules? Most notably, a runner could no longer be put out of play by getting hit with a thrown ball; the Knickerbocker Rules required fielders to tag or force the runner, as is done today. The first competitive game under the new rules was probably played by the Knickerbockers at Elysian Fields in Hoboken, New Jersey.

On the other hand, the old rules sound kind of fun...a sort of X-games/American Gladiator version of baseball. Think of how the game changed that very day. . .you no longer had to be able to lead a runner to peg them. All of sudden the greatest sport of all transmogrified and instead of pegging the runner, you had to learn to throw to a fixed player on your team!

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