The transit and eclipse of Ex-Senator John Edwards (thank God!)

By Pablo Fanque
All This Is That National Affairs Editor


The Ex-Senator with his daughter

A couple years ago, Ex-Senator John Edwards was a serious presidential contender; a nice guy who spoke passionately for the poor and disenfranchised middle-Americans. [ed's note: Pablo Fanque was an early supporter of John Edwards] He was good looking, sunny even, optimistic, ran a clean campaign, didn't take cheap shots, and never ambushed or smeared anyone. He was an asset in the Kerry presidential campaign, particularly stacked up against Darth Cheney.

After years of prevarication, delusion, and denials, Edwards now admits he’s the father of an almost two-year old daughter and that he has been--as we all know--supporting his daughter and baby momma Rielle Hunter. He has not 'fessed up that he tried to get his pal and employee Andrew Young (not the Carter cabinet member/ambassador/pastor ) to take the fall for paternity. But that's OK. After being seriously burned by Edwards, Young decided to let the world in on just what went down. Yes, has his own axes to grind, but his story seems verisimilitudinous.

Edwards made his tawdry announcement in a press release (he’s in Haiti right now!). The country now knows he left his cancer-stricken wife at home and was on the campaign trail playing hide the salami with his videographer. When he was exposed, he spent the next two years engaged in an almost laughable cover-up. In 2007, the National Enquirer reported on Edwards' affair with Rielle Hunter. The mainstream press barely touched the story until they had been scooped by the Enquirer and the story blew up in their faces.



"Game Change" describes Ex-Senator John Edwards and his wife, Elizabeth, as the couple from hell. Tim Rutten, reviewing the book in the Chicago Tribune wrote: "As reported in these pages, he is delusional, megalomaniacal, self-absorbed and breathtakingly irresponsible; she is condescending, viciously insulting and shrewish -- Lady Macbeth with magnolias. It's hard to imagine two people whose public personas have been more at odds with the private reality than apparently has been the case with these people."

Even the bright and long suffering "St. Elizabeth" is on the griddle in the book. As far as I know, these are new revelations. . .at least people have kept the lid on them in the last couple of years.

The aide, Andrew Young, sold a book proposal to St. Martin’s Press for an undisclosed price late last summer (the book is coming out in Feb. 2010). The proposal promised to blow the lid off Edwards' deception. Mr. Young quotes Mr. Edwards, the Dem's 2004 VP nominee who ran for president in 2008, as begging him to confess to fathering Ms. Hunter’s baby. If he did, Edwards promised, "he would be taken care of for life."

Following John Edwards' mea culpa, we wish him the best of luck personally, and hope he can balance his families, wife, and Rielle Hunter. Politically, good riddance, and R.I.P.
---o0o---

John "Douchebag" Edwards DNA matched to baby mama Rielle Hunter

By Pablo Fanque

All This Is That National Affairs Editor

You won't be hearing much from John Edwards anymore. He is now the next gen's Gary Hart, a guy who threw away national office by "stepping out" on his wife. He could have been Attorney General or VP. He could have even mounted a challenge to Obama.

To make matters worse, he has lied about the paternity for years now, even when it was certain to come out. Good riddance, John. I can't believe I ever thought you were the guy. When did you finally break down and tell Elizabeth?

---o0o---

Ex-Senator John Edwards back on the griddle, starring in a sex tape

By Pablo Fanque,
All This Is That National Affairs Editor



You'd think the recent disgrace of Governor Mark Sanford and Senator John Ensign's sex scandals might take some of the heat off John Edwards. At the moment, it seems to have ratcheted up the scrutiny, since the Edwards case goes much deeper--involving paternity, a dying wife, and possible payoffs.

Andrew Young, one of ex-Senator John Edwards's closest aides, is writing a book in which he says Edwards told him he “would be taken care of for life” if he would say that he fathered the baby of Edwards’s girlfriend, Rielle Hunter. The aide (who is not the former ambassador), sold the book to St. Martin’s Press last week. In his proposal, Young says Edwards begged him to confess to fathering the baby.


Hunter and Edwards on the campaign trail

“You know how much I love you," Edwards told Young. "You know I’d walk off a cliff for you, and I know you’d walk off a cliff for me. ” Parts of this story were leaked by someone at the publisher to both the NY Times and the NY Daily News last weekend.


Rielle and baby

In the meantime, feds are looking at whether to prosecute John Edwards if it turns out campaign funds were funneled as hush money to Rielle Hunter or Andrew Young. In 2007, you may recall, Young's attorney said his client was the father just before the Iowa caucus season.

The biggest bombshell appeared in a New York Times article today: Young’s proposal states he was writing the book because he had become disillusioned with the Senator's recklessness after finding a sex tape starring John Edwards and Rielle Hunter. It should be a good one--how many sex tapes are actually filmed by a cinematographer?! How long can it be before the tape appears on the Internet, if it's not out there already? As for Edwards's relationship with his wife--as she said, "it's complicated."
---o0o---

Elizabeth Edwards discusses her douchebag husband with Oprah

Elizabeth Edwards recently told Oprah Winfrey she has "no idea" whether the former presidential candidate is a new dad. The New York Daily News previewed tomorrow's Oprah show here.

Winfrey asked Edwards directly whether she's still in love with her husband. "You know, that's a complicated question," she said.

In an interview set to air Thursday, Oprah Winfrey asks Elizabeth Edwards (who is suffering from terminal cancer) about speculation that Ex-Senator and Ex-Presidential Candidate John Edwards is the father of campaign "videographer" Rielle Hunter's one-year-old daughter.

"I've seen a picture of the baby. I have no idea. It doesn't look like my children but I don't have any idea," Edwards told Winfrey.
---o0o---

John Edwards experienced a Penile Zipper Injury in his rush to escape the Beverly Hilton Hotel

By Pablo Fanque,

All This Is That National Affairs Editor

I wrote an article a couple of days ago, in which I stated that All This Is That had published its last article on Ex-Senator John Edwards. I should have said "next to last."

How was I to know that I would be in the Formosa Cafe in Hollywood the next day, striking up a conversation with a young woman who turned out to be an intern at Cedars Sinai Medical Center (near Beverly Hills and West Hollywood)? Or that she had treated, along with a resident, a man named "Jack Olson" who was in fact John Edwards? And that she would treat him for a trauma that most often occurs in young boys?

You may snigger, but in fact, Ex-Senator Edwards experienced a common emergency room complaint about which dozens of articles have been published in medical journals. Look here. Or here.

As it turns out, my intern friend, Jenny, treated the Ex-Senator for a Penile Zipper Injury. She only understood what actually happened after the National Enquirer broke the story wide open. The Senator was in a hurry to zip up and hightail it out of the Beverly Hilton Hotel when he experienced a most painful misfire. The injury did not require catgut sutures, but did necessitate application of an ointment and dressing to the former Senator's tallywhacker. John Edwards was zipping up quickly as he realized the hotel was crawling with reporters and photographers.

"Jack Olson" and Rielle "Baby Mama" Hunter

The zipper injury John Edwards incurred has thus far not been mentioned in the press. Until today.
---o0o---

John Edwards and Rielle Hunter: the long, slow slide into obscurity begins

illustration from Co-Ed Magazine

By Pablo Fanque
All This Is That National Affairs Editor

This is our last posting on Ex-Senator John Edwards, in order to let him drift into the obscurity he so richly deserves. . .like the old televisions in the 50's and 60's. . .when you turned them off, the picture collapsed to a small dot in the center of the screen that slowly faded away. John Edwards has hinted that he intends to carve out some sort of public role for himself, but that's the same delusional thinking that led to his current predicament. It's time to air the stench out of All This Is That.

According to today's Daily News, "John Edwards didn't confess his adultery with his flaky videographer, Rielle Hunter, until after he officially announced his presidential run in December 2006."

The National Enquirer reports that "Edwards didn't confess until after an unwitting campaign staffer walked in on him with Hunter and word got back to his wife, who confronted him." They further report: "They broke up a bunch of times, especially when Elizabeth was rediagnosed [with cancer]," a friend of Hunter's, Texas publicist Pigeon O'Brien, told People. "But they got back together."

And a "bombshell" that will surprise no one who has followed the story: "sources close to Hunter say that Edwards and his mistress choreographed their public tango over a DNA test: he offered to take one last week, she declined to allow it. "They worked that out together in advance," a source described only as "an insider" told the Enquirer. "She's still protecting John because she loves him and thinks they may eventually have a future together."
---o0o---

The Enquirer says that John Edwards is only hinting at the truth

Rielle and John in happier days

"SEX, MORE LIES & VIDEOTAPE

"The ENQUIRER has uncovered bombshell new details about the John Edwards sex scandal after the former presidential candidate finally admitted he'd cheated on his cancer-stricken wife Elizabeth!Edwards' headline-making admission confirmed The ENQUIRER's blockbuster world exclusive reports detailing his affair, in articles Edwards brazenly called "completely untrue" and "tabloid trash" while running for president and afterward."

"John Edwards is still lying!" a close source told The ENQUIRER. "He lied to his wife Elizabeth, he's lying to Rielle
and he lied all the way through his TV interview!"

"And now The ENQUIRER has uncovered that Edwards' political operatives are still paying his mistress Rielle Hunter - and she was whisked away on a private jet two days before he confessed their extramarital affair on national TV! The ENQUIRER has also confirmed that Edwards secretly visited Rielle and their love child three separate times at the Beverly Hilton hotel in Los Angeles this year - a fact that proves he is still lying to America and his wife."



"ENQUIRER reporters caught Edwards, 55, making a late-night visit to 44-year-old Rielle and their daughter at the hotel on July 21 - which prompted us to release the first-ever photograph of him with his love child last week. " Read the entire story here.
---o0o---

John Edwards: Meet the Press

The mainstream media hung fire when it was a "National Enquirer story," but now that he's let the cat out of the bag, those very same journalists seem to be rather enjoying the drawing and quartering of John Edwards

click to enlarge

---o0o---

John Edwards to take DNA Test in hopes of tamping down baby mama story?

John Edwards and his alleged girlfriend/baby mama Rielly Hunter

This John Edwards-Rielle Hunter love child matter keeps simmering, and spattering, on the back burner. There isn't enough evidence for the mainstream media to do much with the story, but the Republican and Neocon and tabloid blogs make up for their caution. Senator, how will you put this to rest without taking a DNA test, and maybe then slapping the National Enquirer with a big defamation suit that you could even prosecute yourself, After all,
win, lose, or draw on the love-child allegations. . .your goose is cooked, politically. . .no matter how it turns out in the end. In short, you have nothing to lose, Senator Edwards.

The evidence is shaky enough that The Wikipedia won't even let people edit a John Edwards article. And it has had some edits these last couple of weeks, you can bet on that.


click to enlarge

I don't see any way around a DNA test. John Edwards already said he didn't do it. Rielle said he didn't do it. Andrew Young said he is the father. And the story keeps circulating. The story seems so improbable, and his early denunciations so vehement that you had to guess that there was nothing there (but then how many politicians--except Elliott Spitzer--'fess up right away? On the other hand, the National Enquirer did find him in a Los Angeles Hotel, skulking around at 2:45 AM, and even hiding in the bathroom...and this is from an impartial, Non-Enquirer worker at the hotel. We have yet to see a photo or video however.

Three weeks ago, he was bandied about in the mainstream media as a strong VP candidate, and if not the VP, then Attorney General. We haven't heard any more about that lately. This has to put Obama in something of a pickle too.

John Edwards, this silence thing is not working very well for you. It's time to go to the mats and fight the story, or to drop your ambitions and walk away from it forever. If the story is true, you are lower than a snake's sphincter, and if it's false then you deserve to make life miserable for your false accusers. It's one or the other now; the story isn't going away.

It just struck me that if Andrew Young is the father, and the child has now been born, wouldn't a photo possibly clear this up (or put the lie to the Young paternity story)? Andrew Young is African-American, after all, and wouldn't that at least give some credence to the story...whichever way you are swinging with it?
---o0o---

National Enquirer new claim: Rielle Hunter is receiving $15,000 a month hush money/child support from John Edwards' pal

John Edwards with his "other" family?

In an "exclusive," [ed's note: of course anything fictional would be exclusive] the NATIONAL ENQUIRER claims that John Edwards’ purported girfriend and mother of his “love child,” Rielle Hunter, is secretly receiv­ing $15,000 a month "as part of an elaborate cover-up orchestrated by the former presidential contender."



The money is purportedly funneled to Rielle Hunter by a wealthy colleague who was involved in the Edwards’ campaign. "This same man is also shoveling cash to Edwards’ pal and former aide Andrew Young – who tried to take the heat off the ex-Senator by claiming he is the father of Rielle’s baby."
---o0o---

The John Edwards-Rielle Hunter "love child" story bubbles along with no new facts or information

These political scandal stories sometimes leave you wanting more...or at least quick resolution. More in this case means to either excoriate The National Enquirer for irresponsible mud-slinging, or, alas, to write off John Edwards politically, for good.

When the "story" first broke late last year, people wrote off Edwards's presidential campaign. But, then, the story faded away rapidly. Now, with the National Enquirer alleging to have caught him red-handed with the mother of the purported love child, Rielle Hunter, at an LA hotel, the story exploded into national news once again, with the conservative press, talk shows, and republican bloggers fanning the flames. But. once again, the National Enquirer seems to be hanging fire, and have printed or said nothing new since their bombshell late last week.

There has been some follow up, like this piece on foxnews.com, "A Beverly Hills hotel security guard told FOXNews.com he intervened this week between a man he identified as former Sen. John Edwards and tabloid reporters who chased down the former presidential hopeful after what they're calling a rendezvous with his mistress and love child.


"It's not my baby." "It's not his baby."

"The Beverly Hilton Hotel guard said he encountered a shaken and ashen-faced Edwards — whom he did not immediately recognize — in a hotel men's room early Tuesday morning in a literal tug-of-war with reporters on the other side of the door."

Numerous news outlets have reiterated that good Edwards friend, and former Clinton Administration cabinet member, Andrew Young claims paternity of the alleged Edwards and Rielle Hunter love child. However a lot of people don't seem to believe that story....

Google News lists about 68 stories on this one (but incredibly not All This Is That's editorial piece). For Rielle Hunter's part, she maintains, as does Young himself, that Andrew Young is the father of the child.
---o0o---

Does the paternity of Rielle Hunter's baby determine our next Attorney General?

Rielle Hunter

Well, even the National Enquirer is right sometimes, although I hope not in this case. I have been looking forward to John Edwards as Attorney General. If he has been caught with his pants down like this, I suspect we'll know the truth in a couple of days. If this affair and baby are true, how long did he really think he could pull the wool over our eyes? I dunno...he's just seems too smart to be this stupid.
---o0o---

John Edwards/Andrew Young: Who's the father of the "love child"?

Obviously this alleged John Edwards scandal is based on some pretty flimsy evidence. . .wouldn't it have erupted in the mainstream press if there was even a whiff of an affair? Even Matt Drudge backed away from the story. The enquirer does lay out a plausible story, wth many notable gaps, including another man, Andrew Young, claiming paternity of the "love child:"

"Presidential candidate John Edwards is caught up in a love child scandal, a blockbuster ENQUIRER investigation has discovered.The ENQUIRER has learned exclusively that Rielle Hunter, a woman linked to Edwards in a cheating scandal earlier this year, is more than six months pregnant — and she's told a close confidante that Edwards is the father of her baby!The ENQUIRER's political bombshell comes just weeks after Edwards emphatically denied having an affair with Rielle, who formerly worked on his campaign and told another close pal that she was romantically involved with the married ex-senator.The ENQUIRER has now confirmed not only that Rielle is expecting, but that she's gone into hiding with the help of a former aide to Edwards. The visibly pregnant blonde has relocated from the New York area to Chapel Hill, N.C., where she is living in an upscale gated community near political operative Andrew Young, who's been extremely close to Edwards for years and was a key official in his presidential campaign.

---o0o---

The Enquirer John Edwards Affair Story...

A link to the love-child story above...

---o0o---

John Edwards caught in an affair/"love child" scandal?

This is a mindf**ker of all mindf**kers, to quote John Sebastian at Woodstock. John Edwards, close to the last person of either party I would have pegged, seems to be caught up in a "love child" scandal.

The Drudge Report reported this late Tuesday (but Drudge's developing story has been taken down). In short, The National Enquirer *seems* to be about to break a story on John Edwards having an affair and now, apparently impregnating his paramour, who has either come forth, or whose friends have now leaked (or sold!) the story to the National Enquirer. Sure, it is a P.O.S. periodical, but on the other hand, they have broken a lot of real scandal news (along with Matt Drudge) over the last few years.

The story, as I understand it, will appear in the National Enquirer print edition (and their website) tomorrow. It seems to have appeared earlier today on Drudge, but I can't tell, since their story, too, is now a dead link.

Drudge now has a link that goes to a dead Enquirer page. If Matt Drudge has backed off from the story, he was either hectored with the threat of a King-hell lawsuit, or he had doubts about the story himself. And if Matt Drudge has doubts about the story, it has to be pretty flimsy.



According to ogpaper.com: "The National Enquirer is brewing the latest political scandal, John Edwards accused of having a love child."

"The National Enquirer is like an alligator - once the jaws lock, there is no way out. Earlier this year the NE reported on John Edwards and his affair with an unnamed woman from his campaign (follow the links below to read that story). Now, the latest John Edwards scandal - a love child. According to reports, the John Edwards love child scandal will run as part of the front cover of the National Enquirer on Wednesday, the picture was found on the Drudge Report. According to the cover, a woman is pregnant with John Edwards baby and is hiding. The story has not been confirmed or denied by the National Enquirer yet, watch for the magazine tomorrow and keep an eye on further developments in the John Edwards love child scandal. "

I did snag the bitmap above online, but have no way to determine its veracity in this paucity of information. It may be a spoof, or a mockup, or the real thing, of tomorrow's National Enquirer.

You may remember, I always thought both John Edwards and Mitt Romney would surge ahead from their positions at 3rd place, or further back, in the pack. If these allegations have even a whiff of authenticity, we can expect John Edwards to bail out of this race like he was hopping in the first lifeboat off the Titantic. John may have been able to weather this one had it just been another tawdry affair. But Ex-Senator Edwards happens to be married to probably the best-loved spouse among all the G.O.P. and Democratic candidates (except for maybe Bill Clinton), who also happens to have incurable breast cancer. If he is guilty, he, naturally, deserves every bit of ignominy that has been and will be heaped, upon him. If he is just a victim of rumor mongering (as was his running mate John Kerry...remember the stories of the young woman he had a tempestuous affair with? They all turned out to be false), well, then, long may he run! I did support him for President previously, but not this time around, although I would have supported him had he become viable (which so far in this race, he never really has).

If you did have this affair, well then drop out ASAP John, and give a decent guy like Joe Biden a chance! And if you did have the affair, well, then you are a sub-human piece of dogsh*t, and I am embarrassed that I supported you in 200o and 2004.
---o0o---