President Obama's Presidential Library/outhouse appears in Montana

By Pablo Fanque, National Affairs Editor

At least week's Republican convention in Montana, an outhouse labeled Obama Presidential Library was parked outside Missoula’s Hilton Garden Inn.  No one actually claimed responsibility for it, however it did appear in the  Memorial Day parade in Corvallis in Ravalli County.

The outhouse was painted to look as though it had bullet holes in it, and, inside, there was a fake birth certificate for Barack Hussein Obama that was stamped “Bulls**t.”   The outhouse also included the legend 

“For a Good Time call 800-Michelle, Hillary, Pelosi

Keep it classy Montana!

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Election night rumination: BHO is going to win; Mitt Romney is desperately out of touch; Rick Santorum is in touch, but insane

By Jack Brummet, Editor-in-chief

Since Pablo Fanque, our National Affairs Editor and political whiz is M.I.A.(after promising to live blog the Michigan and Arizona primaries), I wanted to mention a couple of things.

In his speech tonight, Rick Santorum once again shows he has what it takes to connect with the voters.  I disagreed with nearly every clause of the speech, but he has a way of reaching out that Mitt Romney will never achieve.  Listen to the cadences and delivery of Mitt Romney's victory speech tonight.  It sounded like his basic $35,000 speech to an insurance convention. 

This should have been Mitt Romney's night. And he blew it.  He came from way behind in his home state to triumph.  But he never even talked about Michigan, or growing up there, or his deep connection to the people of that state.  He didn't mention it at all.  There was no real joy in his speech.  It felt like a candidate that resented he'd been forced to work so hard to win.  He should have laughed and expressed his great delight that his home state pulled through for him.  And he did not.  I don't think Mitt Romney's a scary guy, but I do think he is seriously out of touch, as we've seen over and over again in his foolish, unscripted, utterances. Mitt needs a new speechwriter.  He needs to think about retail politics.  He needs to read Chris Matthews's masterful book on political strategy, "Hardball."

Tonight President Obama delivered a masterful speech to the U.A.W. in Washington (the other Washington).  It was brilliant, inspiring, and it reached out to the voters. . .and connected.  BHO, like Romney, needs to remember to connect.  And he can; it's second nature to him.  Unfortunately, this is the only clip that's online at the moment.  If you get a chance, check out the entire speech.  The crux of it was that "you, the American people, did this."  He didn't talk about his brilliance as a manager; he talked about how people pulled together.  The President is back.  Now, it's on to November 6th!

If you get the chance, look for the entire speech...

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Alien Lore No. 219 — Did young Barack Obama visit Mars?

By Jack Brummet, Alien Lore Editor

photograph of Mars' surface courtesy of JPL/NASA

“Simply put, your task is to be seen and not eaten,” retired astronaut Army Maj. Ed Dames, told a young Barack Obama as he was sent on a mission to Mars.  Wired's Danger Room recently told of  a claim by Andrew D. Basiago and William Stilling (who say they were time-traveling government agents) that the CIA organized missions to explore Mars during the 1980's.  More than one of these missions included the 19 year old future President. 

Basiago and Stilling say that BHO was one of a group of young people selected to teleport and from Mars.  Mr. Obama is said to have visited Mars twice between 1981 and 1983 via a "jump room."

The CIA wished to “establish a defense regime protecting the Earth from threats from space” as well as a legal claim to “territorial sovereignty.”  "Obama’s CIA handlers needed him to 'acclimate Martian humanoids and animals to their presence' in order to secure the U.S.-Martian alliance."  

Tommy Vietor, a National Security Council spokesperson says that The President never went to Mars, unless you count "watching Marvin the Martian."

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George Clooney on keeping the faith with BHO

By Pablo Fanque, National Affairs Editor

George Clooney's recent statement on keeping the faith with our President; he's not wrong.  Although BHO was not my first choice as President, I tend to be a yellow dog Democrat, as should most of the Democrats who seem to have lost the faith. 

We should not forget just what a re-elected President can pull off in his second term--at least during the the first 2.5 years.  And don't forget that he will likely be able to name one more Supreme if he is re-elected.  Or would you perhaps prefer to see whom Presidents Gingrich or Romney pulls out of their hats as a nominee?

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Contrary to the wingnuts' claims, BHO is no dove. He's a Scoop Jackson Democrat.

Pablo Fanque, National Affairs Editor

Image from JP Moore at Buzzfeed.

I've never doubted BHO's bellicosity; I never thought he was soft on war. He let us know that from the very beginning.  He was never against war, but he was very particular about which war he wanted.  The difference between him and President George W. Bush was the focus of their multi-pronged war, not war itself. In some ways, he's a Scoop Jackson defense democrat (if you doubt that, look at the current defense and war budgets), who is now facing potential action in Pakistan, and if things blow up, Iran.  And those wars are in addition to sending troops and advisers into other various hot spots and troubled regions (for example, Libya and Egypt).  He may not be a hawk, but he is a Defense Democrat ala JFK.   Appeasement?  Come on.  President Barack Obama is no George McGovern or Gene McCarthy.  And he most certainly is not a Neville Chamberlain.  

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Philip Levine on BHO, and The Presidency

By Jack Brummet, Poetry Editor

I've always liked Philip Levine's poetry, and his politics.  At 83, he is our new Poet Laureate.  This morning in the New York Times Magazine, he weighed in on President Obama, and who we probably need as President right now.  His answer was stunning (all the more so, because I think he's right, and I've mentioned the same fellow before here).

You’ve said you always vote for “the impossible losing candidate” that the Democrats put up. Your team actually won last time. What do you think so far?

Philip Levine:  Well, we think we won.

You think Obama’s a Manchurian Candidate?

Philip Levine:  No. I don’t. But I think I voted for a man who is not as able and confident as I thought. When he campaigned, he seemed like a genius, but I think he may not have been up to the task. It’s foolish to say this, but the guy we need right now is Lyndon Johnson. We need a bully and a really shrewd manipulator.

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The National Debt—apportioning blame from RWR down to BHO

By Pablo Fanque, National Affairs Editor
illustration by Jack Brummet

This is an interesting chart, and you can poke a lot of holes in it in various spots, but it is more or less correct.  And while the s***-storm began coming down during President George W. Bush's last year in office, and may indeed have been aggravated by his actions and policies, we all know, ineluctably, that the bulk of the blame is apportioned—whether it makes sense or not—on the President upon whose watch said s***-storm finally came down, whether he really he had anything to do with it or not.

President Obama is on track to raise about $1 billion dollars in campaign contributions.  It will be interesting to see if even that war chest can deflect the ugly mood out there in America.
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The Corn Dog Meme Continues. . .

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Two takeaway quotes from BHO's speech to Congress on The Jobs Act

By Jack Brummet, Congressional Editor

"We are tougher than the times that we live in, and we are bigger than our politics have been. So let’s meet the moment."

“The question is whether, in the face of an ongoing national crisis, we can stop the political circus and actually do something to help the economy.”

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George Clooney affirms he is not and will not be running for President

By Pablo Fanque, National Affairs Editor

George Clooney said today that he will not be running for the office of President of the United States, now or in the future. 

This is no surprise to us. The actor, in February, told Newsweek that he "did too many drugs" to ever seek office.  "I f***ed too many chicks and did too many drugs, and that’s the truth."

He may play a dirty presidential candidate in the upcoming drama "The Ides of March," but in real life the actor would never dream of running for office.  "I didn't live my life in the right way for politics," he said when he was approached by the California Democratic Party. 

A savvy politician, Clooney said, "would start from the beginning by saying, 'I did it all. I drank the bong water. Now let's talk about issues,'" said Clooney. "That’s gonna be my campaign slogan: 'I drank the bong water'?"

Clooney's new political thriller--Ides of March--comes out next month, with George playing a Presidential candidate who doesn't hesitate to get into the gutter.  Working on that movie did not infect him with the necessary lust, ambition, and madness to run for national office. 

"As for running for president, look, there's a guy in office right now who is smarter than almost anyone you know, who's nicer and who has more compassion than almost anyone you know. And he's having an almost impossible time governing. Why would anybody volunteer for that job?," Clooney told reporters at the Venice Film Festival, according to the Associated Press.

As you probably know, George Clooney has spent some time over the years with President Obama, and was friends with him during his years in the Senate.  He met The President last year to talk about what he saw on a trip to the Sudan.

“I have a really good job,” he said, "I have no interest."

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Photograph: Ike Lines Up A Putt

By Pablo Fanque
National Affairs Editor

President Dwight D. Eisenhower lines up a putt.  Although Ike is probably the most famous golfing President, as it turns out, President Obama is on track to eclipse him in the number of golf outings (presuming, of course, that he has eight years to do this).

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Mort: Notes on the decaffeination of Osama bin Laden:::::The ethical implications of celebrating even a monster's demise:::::Are we just as barbaric as the Romans at their worst?:::::Will the wingnuts try to frame this as a hoax?

By Jack Brummet, Unexplained Phenomena Editor

 

 

My friend, Jason Larsen, wonders if the very public and emotional celebration of Osama bin Laden's death shows our barbaric side?  My knee-jerk reaction was--come on, don't be a weenie, Jason.  But in fact, as a student of Roman history, yeah, it spooks me to the core.  Especially because I am one of the ones who, if not enjoying this, are feeling at least relieved, and even more guiltily, very glad it happened on BHO's watch.  My feelings about that are mixed--I've been a skeptic about President Obama's stances on war and gay marriage, and a couple of other issues.  I never thought we should escalate the war the way we have.  But I always thought we should crank up the CIA, Special Forces, and The Spooks in general in our efforts to eviscerate Al Qaeda (including cutting off the snake's head). I don't know if the massive troops deployments helped in this or not, but clearly the intelligence and counter terrorism operations and maybe even Black Ops, did lead us to this moment. Let's just not get carried away and have a jump the shark/Team America celebration about this. 

I wonder what my Buddhist friends (whose hearts I trust) think of this joyous celebration? It is a little unseemly yes, even barbaric--ala Rome--but like I just wrote to Jason, I think I would have been one of the street dancers on April 28, 1945, when Hitler decommissioned himself. Yeah I do feel sorry for his four or five wives and 24 children. I don't feel all that much joy, but a lot of relief. Is it misplaced relief? Or false relief? Probably. But it's something. A big something.

 

One of my Facebook friends wonders if the birther wingnuts will claim this is all cooked up.  Or that we kept his corpse in a freezer to pop out at just the right moment (which numerous "news" sites and bloggers have already postulated).  Trust me, The Company will have a iron-clad chain of evidence detailing the facts and meetings that led up to this, along with DNA, photos and video as it happened--none of which they will release unless their backs are up against the wall...or Julian Assange/Wikileaks gets their hands on it.

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Obama Vs. Trump: What a great time for the Correspondent's Dinner. We most enjoyed seeing The Donald cringing under the kleig lights

By Pablo Fanque, National Affairs Editor

It was good to see The Chief tear into The Donald at the correspondent's dinner. Trump was booed and ostracized by the entire crowd, and Seth Meyers administered the coup de grâce. Trump was clearly and most deservedly pained.

illustration by jack brummet

BHO: “Donald Trump is here tonight. Now, I know that he’s taken some flak lately, but no one is prouder to put this birth certificate to rest than The Donald. Now he can get to focusing on the issues that matter. Like, did we fake the moon landing? What really happened at Roswell? And where are Biggie and Tupac?”

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Donald Trump takes credit for Obama birth certificate release and immediately demands his college grades

By Jack Brummet,
Unexplained Phenomena Editor

This is a quick follow up to Pablo Fanque's post this morning on the birth certificate release and Obama press conference (read it here:  "We do not have time for this kind of silliness": President Obama releases long form birth certificate, Donald Trump takes credit).

Trump, on the stump in New Hampshire, told reporters this morning--after taking credit for the release of President Obama's birth certificate (“Today, I’m very proud of myself because I accomplished something that nobody else has been able to accomplish")--that BHO should now also release his college transcripts!

“The word is, according to what I’ve read, that he was a terrible student when he went to Occidental,” Trump told reporters covering him. “He then gets to Columbia; he then gets to Harvard. … How do you get into Harvard if you're not a good student? Now, maybe that’s right, or maybe it’s wrong. But I don’t know why he doesn’t release his records.”

“Everyone says he was this great student. Well, if he was, that’s great, and if he wasn’t, that’s great,” he said.
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"We do not have time for this kind of silliness": President Obama releases long form birth certificate, Donald Trump takes credit

By Pablo Fanque
National Affairs Editor

The White House released President Obama's long-form birth certificate to the press this morning, and a somewhat pissed-off/frustrated/exasperated President took some time to speak to the assembled pack of reporters.

This may well cool the jets of the press who have joyfully kept fanning the flames of this story.  But, alas, I don't think it will slow down the Birther-Republican-Tea Party.  Yes, most elected officials will drop it now, but the wingnuts will never be happy until BHO is out of office, one way or the other.

It will be interesting to see how Donald Trump handles this new evidence, and whether or not he will keep beating the dead horse (see illustration at the end of this article).  Our money is on The Donald not standing down, and in fact, we think this will lead to him cranking up his flimsy act.  For the moment, he is taking the high road, telling reporters:

“I am really honored, frankly, to have played such a big role in hopefully getting rid of this issue.” - Donald Trump in New Hampshire this morning

Visit msnbc.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

Transcipt of Obama Press Conference:

Hello, everybody. Now let me just comment, first of all, on the fact that I can't get the networks to break in on all kinds of other discussions. I was just back there listening to Chuck. He was saying, "It's amazing that he's not going to be talking about national security."

I would not have the networks breaking in if I was talking about that, Chuck, and you know it.

As many of you have been briefed, we provided additional information today about the site of my birth.

Now, this issue has been going on for two, two and a half years now. I think it started during the campaign. And I have to say that over the last two and a half years I have watched with bemusement, I have been puzzled at the degree to which this thing just kept on going.

We've had every official in Hawaii, Democrat and Republican, every news outlet that has investigated this confirm that, yes, in fact, I was born in Hawaii August 4th, 1961, in Kapiolani Hospital. We've posted the certification that is given by the state of Hawaii on the Internet for everybody to see. People have provided affidavits that they, in fact, have seen this birth certificate.

And yet this thing just keeps on going.

Now, normally, I would not comment on something like this, because, obviously, there's a lot of stuff swirling in the press at any given day and I've got other things to do.

But two weeks ago, when the Republican House had put forward a budget that will have huge consequences potentially to the country, and when I gave a speech about my budget and how I felt that we needed to invest in education and infrastructure and making sure that we had a strong safety net for our seniors even as we were closing the deficit, during that entire week, the dominant news story wasn't about these huge, monumental choices that we're going to have to make as a nation, it was about my birth certificate. And that was true on most of the news outlets that were represented here.

And so I just want to make a larger point here. We've got some enormous challenges out there. There are a lot of folks out there who are still looking for work. Everybody is still suffering under high gas prices. We're going to have to make a series of very difficult decisions about how we invest in our future, but also get a hold of our deficit and our debt -- how do we do that in a balanced way.

And this is going to generate huge and serious debates, important debates. And there are going to be some fierce disagreements. And that's good; that's how democracy is supposed to work.

And I'm confident that the American people and America's political leaders can come together in a bipartisan way and solve these problems. We always have.

But we're not going to be able to do it if we are distracted. We're not going to be able to do it if we spend time vilifying each other.

We're not going to be able to do it if we just make stuff up and pretend that facts are not facts. We're not going to be able to solve our problems if we get distracted by sideshows and carnival barkers.

We live in a serious time right now, and we have the potential to deal with the issues that we confront in a way that will make our kids and our grandkids and our great grandkids proud. And I have every confidence that America in the 21st century is going to be able to come out on top just like we always have. But we're going to have to get serious to do it.

Now, I know that there's going to be a segment of people for which, no matter what we put out, this issue will not be put to rest. But I'm speaking to the vast majority of the American people, as well as to the press.

We do not have time for this kind of silliness. We've got better stuff to do. I've got better stuff to do. We got big problems to solve, and I'm confident we can solve them, but we're going to have to focus on them, not on this.

Thanks very much, everybody.

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A protest sign (re: Barack Obama and another historical figure)

Thanks to Jeff Clinton for this contribution [provenance unknown].  /eds.

click to enlarge

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Jumping to conclusions: Fox News Spins President Obama's children's book

click to enlarge

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President Obama's one term?

By Pablo Fanque
All This Is That National Affairs Editor

"If the president goes down the reelection road, we are guaranteed two years of political gridlock at a time when we can ill afford it," Pat Caddell and Doug Schoen wrote in yesterday's Washington Post. "But by explicitly saying he will be a one-term president, Obama can deliver on his central campaign promise of 2008, draining the poison from our culture of polarization and ending the resentment and division that have eroded our national identity and common purpose."

Really? I like the premise (and it is not unprecedented....just ask LBJ--the last voluntary one-term President), but what would really happen is that the GOP would see this as the ultimate capitulation and weakness and would then proceed to steamroll the President for the next two years, leaving us in worse shape than if he went ahead with what to some might seem to be a futile campaign and election.  Or, I guess, he could "pull a Palin," and just quit now and leave Hillary and Smilin' Joe to sort out the mess...

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President Obama's illegitimate Presidency

By Pablo Fanque
National Affairs Editor
Research by Jack Brummet

What will it take to convince the teabaggers, conspiracy theorists, and wingnuts that President Barack Obama (they usually prefer to include his middle name) is in fact a legitimate President, who is neither a Muslim, nor was born in Kenya?  Facts haven't worked, his relatively centrist Presidency has convinced no one, and his very public declarations of Christianity seem to convinced no one on the far right.  He even stands shoulder to shoulder with them on gay marriage!  And yet, a small, but highly vocal contingent of nutjobs consider him to be not an American by birth, but also a Muslim who lied his way into the Oval Office--a Trojan Horse of Islam.

Recently, BHO called off a visit to the Golden Temple in Punjab, India, due to “logistical problems.”  There were, at the time, numerous reports (which the White House vigorously denied,) that in fact, The Prez didn't want to wear the white robe traditionally worn in the temple. Before the mid-term elections, he wanted to avoid another photo that might be used as "proof" that he is Muslim by his political enemies.

While no one in their right mind takes these claims seriously, it is a sad state of affairs that the wingnuts and teabaggers can have that degree of influence on the President.  Unfortunately, unless conventional wisdom is seriously wrong, it looks like those very groups will at the least have some wind under their sails after the elections next month. 

With a little power, maybe the tea party will begin to focus less on the wedge issues, and more on the substantial political and social ones.  It's hard to tell with these folks.  Honestly, probably the best thing for the Democratic Party would be if the tea party and its sympathizers focused on the Presidential campaigns of Sarah Palin, Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich, and whatever other deranged dingbats emerge from the closet over the next year or so.  While the Tea Party seems able to stir up pockets of support in localized areas, up to and including entire states, on a larger canvass, their message and their anger will be accorded the scant respect it deserves.
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Tata, Rahm...Godspeed on the road to the Chicago Mayor's office

By Pablo Fanque
National Affairs Editor

Well, it hasn't been a secret--for six months or so (and, really, longer), the rumors have been out there. Obviously BHO knew about it too.  Rahm has never kept it a secret--even when he was a congressman.  This is the job he really wanted.  And I have to admit, I think he'll be a pretty damned good big city mayor.

Other chiefs of staff have gone on to "bigger" things--Dick Cheney, James Baker, Gen, Haig, Rumsfeld, Donald Regan...

Two years is about the norm, really. It's just about as much as anyone in their right mind can take.  And he's not exactly well-loved, even around the white house.  Yeah, it does make it look like people are abandoning ship...what are you going to do? The ship is definitely taking on water, but it's fundamentally sound.  And it's probably time to re-energize the place with fresh meat.
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