Mini-editorial: Pablo Fanque weighs in on BHO's surprise Nobel Peace Prize

By Pablo Fanque,
All This Is That National Affairs Editor

Yes, I too think BHO's Peace Prize may be just a tad bit premature, but that aside, it's been well worth it to enjoy the agony and apoplexy of the pundits and foot soldiers on the far right. A couple of them--I am pretty sure--were on... the brink of achieving self-ignition. Flame on knuckleheads! Spontaneous combustion can actually be a good thing!

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Digital art: Keelin Curran

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God, The Moon, and F***ing With The Formula

Appropos of the space agency dropping a spent rocket on the moon about three hours from now —



Although, in many ways, I think NASA is one of the coolest things we have ever done, I am always slightly mystified at the way they relentlessly search our corner of the universe for carbon-based life forms, and for water. All this seems to presume that God, as he created Life in other sectors, wouldn't have been somehow tempted to "F*** With The Formula."


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The Day Lady Died by Frank O'Hara

Frank O'Hara is one of my favorite American poets, not only did he pioneer a loose, but wisely and charmingly idiomatic verse form, but he also happened to be a curator of the Museum of Modern Art, probably my favorite museum in the United States. And Billie Holiday is by far and away my favorite jazz singer of all time, even 'though I usually tend to think of jazz vocals in the same category as rock instrumentals. . .

The Day Lady Died
by Frank O'Hara

It is 12:20 in New York a Friday
three days after Bastille day, yes
it is 1959 and I go get a shoeshine
because I will get off the 4:19 in Easthampton
at 7:15 and then go straight to dinner
and I don't know the people who will feed me

I walk up the muggy street beginning to sun
and have a hamburger and a malted and buy
an ugly NEW WORLD WRITING to see what the poets
in Ghana are doing these days
in Ghana are doing these days I go on to the bank
and Miss Stillwagon (first name Linda I once heard)
doesn't even look up my balance for once in her life
and in the GOLDEN GRIFFIN I get a little Verlaine
for Patsy with drawings by Bonnard although I do
think of Hesiod, trans. Richmond Lattimore or
Brendan Behan's new play or Le Balcon or Les Nègres
of Genet, but I don't, I stick with Verlaine
after practically going to sleep with quandariness

and for Mike I just stroll into the PARK LANE
Liquor Store and ask for a bottle of Strega and
then I go back where I came from to 6th Avenue
and the tobacconist in the Ziegfeld Theatre and
casually ask for a carton of Gauloises and a carton
of Picayunes, and a NEW YORK POST with her face on it





and I am sweating a lot by now and thinking of
leaning on the john door in the 5 SPOT
while she whispered a song along the keyboard
to Mal Waldron and everyone and I stopped breathing
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All This Is That Art and Images

Many or most of the photos, images, and art in All This Is That can be found at my Picasa photo site. I don't know if everything is there, but there are several thousand images...
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Megan Fox's vagina

By Pablo Fanque,
All This Is That National Affairs Editor


Megan Fox hints at the location of her pride and joy

I don't know much, really, about Megan Fox (I've never seen her in a movie, or even on TV), or her vagina. I do know she is extremely popular with young men, and has made a lot of provocative statements about her sexuality (not really provocative...she just stated that she is a switch-hitter). She is often listed on "men's magazines'" hottest lists, and while she is not yet on the A list of babes with Britney, Angelina, et al, she seems to be making a run for it.

I do know that over the last few weeks, I've seen various articles, blog posts, and stories in which Megan Fox discusses the power of her vagina, and vaginas in general. In the last issue of Rolling Stone, she goes on at some length about the power of the vagina.

“Men are scared of vaginas,” [Ed's note: apparently not just the dentata variety] she said. She told Rolling Stone that a woman is most powerful when she's “completely in charge of her sexuality."

As for her own nappy dugout? Fox says she possesses a "powerful, confident vagina.”

There does seem to be something of a double standard at work here. You can only guess what kind of storm would hail down if a young male actor began touting the power of his penis.
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Poem: 3 A.M.

The house is still as a painted boat
On a painted sea,

Quiet as the pond
In Monet's Water Lillies,

And as dark
As Mephistopheles' rectum.
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Alien Lore No. 159 - The Russkies open up their Grey/UFO motherlode

Thanks to Jeff Clinton for the tip on this story.

The Russian navy recently declassified its records of close encounters with The Greys and with UFOs, according to the Svobodnaya Pressa news website. Only a few months ago, France also declassified and released their own UFO files....

The records from the Soviet years were assembled from navy reports of close encounters with submarines and ships. The group headed by a deputy Navy commander, Admiral Nikolay Smirnov, uncovered numerous cases of possible UFO encounters, according to the website.

Vladimir Azhazha, former navy officer and a Russian UFO researcher, says “Fifty percent of UFO encounters are connected with oceans. Fifteen more – with lakes. So UFOs tend to stick to the water,” he said. A nuclear submarine, on a combat mission in the Pacific Ocean, detected six unknown objects. After the crew failed to leave dodge their pursuers by maneuvering, the captain ordered to surface. The objects followed suit, took to the air, and flew away.

Dozens of mysterious events went down near the Bermuda Triangle, according to a retired submarine commander Rear Admiral Yury Beketov, in which instruments malfunctioned with no apparent reason or detected strong interference. On several occasions the instruments gave readings of UFOs moving at 240 miles per hour. Underwater.

Navy intelligence veteran, Captain 1st rank Igor Barklay says “Ocean UFOs often show up wherever our or NATO’s fleets concentrate. Near Bahamas, Bermudas, Puerto Rico. They are most often seen in the deepest part of the Atlantic Ocean, in the southern part of the Bermuda
Triangle, and also in the Caribbean Sea.”

The archives contain numerous reports of UFO encounters near Russia’s Lake Baikal, the deepest fresh water body in the world. Fishermen tell stories of powerful lights shining up from the deep and objects flying up from the water.

In 1982, military divers at Baikal spotted a group of humanoid creatures dressed in silver suits. The encounter happened at a depth of 170 feet, and the divers attempted to catch the strangers. Three of the seven men died, while four others were severely injured. Greys 1, Russia 0.

Vladimir Azhazha says “Skepticism is the easiest way: believe nothing, do nothing. People rarely visit great depths. So it’s very important to analyze what they encounter there.”

Russian Navy officials deny that a collection of UFO encounters exists. Really?
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We're freakin' out, Mr. President

By Pablo Fanque, All This Is That National Affairs Editor
Jack Brummet, Illustrations

President BHO is largely doing the right things--making the right initiatives, making the right friends, searching out the right boogyemen, and working on a nightmarish, hydra-headed number of fronts. but. But. But. He is sometimes, apparently, publicly side-tracked from unblocking the myriad bottlenecks and logjams and from implementing policy. It's beginning to impact his mission, or more correctly, people's perceptions of How's He Doing? Do we think that flying to Copenhagen to throw a Hail Mary for his home town, or having his old Professor and a rogue cop to the White House to settle their differences over a few brewskis has thrown him off course from health care reform, the egg-shell fragile economy, depressing unemployment statistics, and pursuing his double wars in Iraq and Afghanistan? No, not really. But the perception among the public is another story. Every time BHO appears sidetracked, he throws raw meat to the Republicans, Fox News, the neo-con crowd, and even faithful supporters, like us.



It didn't help that the Obamas' speeches in Copenhagen seemed oddly off-point, and, at times, shockingly ego-centric. Michelle Obama, of whom we are big fans, gave a touching speech about her father that couldn't have been less germane to the big question: "Why would we give the Olympics to you? Because it would be such an honor to have them in America? In this town, that has been spattered across the headlines this month as violent, corrupt, and heartless?"

Barack Obama's speech wasn't much better, offering little of substance, and sounding suspiciously jingoistic.

Hey folks, this was a fool's mission. Rio, Tokyo, Madrid, Chicago? Which city would you want to spend a week in? That and the fact that many of the deciders were no doubt treated to trips to Rio, spending a few days fried to the hatline on free booze, great food, and topless white sand beaches. Even BHO couldn't put Chicago over the top in what some insiders say is the tightest race for the Games in its history. Many believe that when Obama elected to go to Copenhagen to deliver the closing remarks of Chicago's final presentation, the move would seal the deal to send the games to Chicago. The President, flying home, received the news that Chicago didn't have a chance. Incidentally, before leaving Copenhagen, BHO held a meeting with one of his military leaders, flown in from the front. This sadly transparent dodge, in the end, did nothing to lesson the avalanche of criticism of The President. It will all die down quickly, of course. It is a tempest in a teapot. . .but it also adds up over time


It's baffling to us why The President is expending his precious political capital on these lesser issues. Michael Steele, the GOP chairman, and a man with whom we almost never agree, hit it on the head (and that is a rarity!):

Michael Steele called the president’s trip to Copenhagen meant to boost Chicago’s chances of hosting the 2016 Summer Games a “noble idea.” He refused to answer if he thought it was a mistake, but said it’s “in the eye of the beholder.”

“If it’s [health care] that's important, Mr. President, then stay home and get it done,” Steele said.
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drawing: face-off

click to enlarge
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Poem: Platoon

click to enlarge


We all have a platoon
Of partly-contained,
Spooky and multiple personalities
Ready to burst from the clown car confines.
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Alien Lore No. 158 - The Apollo 12 UFO sightings

Apollo 12, with Charles Conrad, Dick Gordon, Allan Bean was airborne-- less than a minute after blast-off, when it was hit by a bolt of lightning . All electrical equipment shut down, but within three minutes , power was restored. The source of the bolt remained a mystery to space experts. No one could ever really explain where the lightning came from, if it was lightning.

As Apollo 12 rocketed at the Moon, observatories throughout Europe began reporting sightings of two bright flashing unknown objects in the craft's vicinity. One UFO semed to be following the spacecraft, and the other seemed to be traveling in front of it. Both objects were blinking on and off rapidly. On November 15th, the three Apollo 12 astronauts told Mission Control/Houston that they had in fact sighted two "bogeys."

The rest of the story? Crickets, so far.
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