The Ghost of Crawford: Ex-President Bush battles depression, confusion, enuresis, and empty nest syndrome

By Pablo Fanque
All This Is That National Affairs editor
Illustrations by Jack Brummet


click to enlarge this VidCap

He welcomed retirement as an opportunity to "replenish the coffers," but ex-President George W. Bush has largely spent the last 296 days waiting for the phone to ring and trying to fill the long hours between dawn and sunset.

Two staffers wrote in email exchanges with me that in his early days of retirement on the ranch, President Bush became so "agitated" over negative references in the press that staff took to hiding newspapers or magazines with articles that might upset him.


Naturally, The New York Times and Washington Post have virtually disappeared from the media packet he receives each morning. In fact, his staff, on numerous occasions, has hidden the White House Daily Intelligence Briefing because of references to his administration's mistakes, errors, and misdemeanors.



Ex-Veep Cheney no longer bothers with appearances. He quit telephoning The Ex-President not long after leaving office. Although Dick Cheney spent much of 2009 defending the Bush Administration's actions and policies, he no longer speaks with his former boss. When President Bush refused to give Cheney's hatchet-man Scooter Libby a full and unconditional pardon, the cord was severed. Any drum beating Cheney does on the talk show circuit and elsewhere is strictly self-aggrandizing. When The President showed a little backbone, the Vice President lost interest. With George Bush no longer his compliant Jerry Mahoney, the Vice-President was no longer pitching, but catching.

Not only are GWB's old friends not around, but Laura Bush is frequently absent as well. After she sloughed the shackles of the White House, she began to enjoy life again, traveling, going to the opera, and out to dinner with old friends (where she can drink). She often flies off for extended weekends at spas with a close group of friends. While she is away, the former President often sits and stares out the window.

There have also been moments of confusion that worry friends and staffers. One ranch-hand told me about the time George Bush climbed on a horse backward and asked him "why does this saddle have no horn?" Another staffer reported The President asking him to fuel up his cigarette boat so he could go fishing. The ranch is land-locked.

As perhaps the final indignity, President Bush's enuresis has returned. As you may recall, we earlier reported on The former President's problem with bed-wetting.



Other All This Is That postings on the former President:

George Bush sees ghosts
President Bush finally beats Nixon & becomes the most unpopular ...
Former Press Secretary McClellan says Bush, Cheney, Rove, Libby Lied
Laura Bush puts the mark on George Bush/President Bush rumored to ...
Retired General George Washington Lashes Out At President Bush
Jimmy Carter Reams Bush: Bush Responds Like A Wounded Swamp Sow
President Bush drunk at Camp David
Alien Lore No. 65 - George Bush, Dick Cheney & The Greys
President Bush: "Stop doing this shit!"
President Bush lights up the "c***suckers" in the press
President Bush, remembering images of her tush, makes a move on ...
President Bush, reacting to yesterday's article on All This Is ...
President George Bush 'channels' Adolph Hitler during Iowa speech (includes audio clip)Presidents Bush and Chirac, and Queen Elizabeth II F*** For Peace!Priests to Purify Archeological Site After President Bush VisitFormer President George HW Bush excoriates his son's war
Bush and Abramoff captured together in explicit photographs
President Hugo Chávez: Hang President Bush First
Revelation: President Now Suffers Enuresis--More Trouble Every Day
George Bush sees ghosts
Priests to Purify Archeological Site After President Bush
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"You can take that to the bank": BHO in 2007: I will end the war

BHO on the campaign trail in 2007 explains how the first thing he will do in office is end the war. Two years later, he ponders just how much to expand the war in Afghanistan, and no doubt, any other 'Stans that need a tune-up.


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Six and a half Seasons of The Sopranos in nine minutes

It's a little bit snarky, but good. One guy's rundown of the entire story arc of The Sopranos. In nine minutes.



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A severed pig's head in Redmond, Wash.

Thanks to Jason Larsen for pointing out this strange story, although I have to admit it's not completely strange. We've written about paranormal activity in Redmond before (the aliens at the Nike Base on Education Hill). But this one is clearly terrestrial.

When I was in 9th grade, we performed a similar prank. We appropriated two sheep heads from the Kent Junior High biology labs and deposited one on the porch of our vile shop teacher, Mr. Ed Becker, and one in the mailbox of our vice-principal. Our shop teacher mentioned it in class, and I couldn't help but smile. I was not only smiling, but I had a s**t-eating grin. Mr. Becker called me out "Blummet! [which is what he always called me], you don't know anything about this?" I could only respond that while I wasn't involved, I admired the actions of whatever other juvenile delinquents did pull it off. "No, I'm sorry Mr. Becker. I regret I can't claim responsibility..." But I digress.

According to the Seattle Post Intelligencer website [our former morning newspaper now website], a Redmond homeowner just found a severed pig's head on his front doorstep.

As reported by the P.I., "A Lionsgate Townhomes resident woke up Monday morning to find a 'severed large pig's head' on his front doorstep, according to Redmond Police.

Police spokesman Lt. Charlie Gorman, said the pig's head was placed on a ground-floor unit front doorstep in the middle of the night.

As is always the case, the victim "said he had no idea why someone would do this and did not know of anyone who would do this."

Lieutenant Gorman said that the case is "inactive" because there are no leads or suspects., and they know of no other similar cases in recent history according to Gorman. In the meantime, Redmond resident, please note there is a lot of good eating in a pig's head. You could make scrapple for breakfast. Don't think of this as some weird or sinister event. . .look at it as a gift. And start cooking!
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Happy Veteran's Day to the two veterans who begat me

Thank you to all the veterans today for all you endured for us, and especially the three who happened to be my parents and uncle. (click photographs to enlarge)


Corporal John Brummet

My father, John Newton Brummet, Jr., joined the army a couple of years after dropping out of school in the eighth grade. He was discharged from the army not long before Pearl Harbor and then enlisted in the Navy, where he served for the duration of the war.

My Uncle, Bill Jones, enlisted in the Navy with a friend the day after Pearl Harbor. He was a senior at Ballard High School. The picture below with my mom was probably taken when he returned in June, 1942, to graduate with his class before getting back on a ship.


Betty Echo Jones on leave in her dress uniform


Betty Echo Jones and her twin brother Bill, June, 1942

Betty Echo Jones Brummet stayed in school and graduated. After high school, she worked as a riveter (yes, the iconic Rosie) and later joined the Marine Corps, for the duration. When she joined the Marines, she followed in her father's footsteps. William Jennings Bryan Jones was a marine veteran of World War I. He signed up again in World War II, when he had to be at least forty.


John Newton Brummet, Jr. clowning in the army


John Newton Brummet, Jr. clowning in the navy
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Republican Family Values, part 26: Idaho GOP national committeeman Blake Hall loses job over stalking and lobbing used condoms on ex-girlfriend's lawn

By Pablo Fanque,
All This Is That Crime and Punishment editor

Blake Hall, a leader in Idaho GOP and national politics for almost 25 years, was fired Monday as deputy prosecuting attorney in eastern Idaho. He just resigned from the Republican National Committee. The former Idaho Board of Education member pleaded guilty last week to stalking his former girlfriend and is serving a two-week jail sentence. He also sentenced to a year of supervised probation. but for some reason, a six-month jail sentence was suspended.

On ten different days—Hall tossed semen-filled condoms onto his ex-girlfriend’s lawn. He had stalked her for half a year. His victim said, “I was so tired of being victimized. It is unimaginable that a 56-year-old would be so deviant.”

Between March and August this year, Hall often followed his victim to restaurants, movies and home. He ignored her repeated requests to be left alone, according to police records and court testimony.

The victim said Hall once followed her to a Walmart, and took her car keys until she agreed to “hear him out” concerning her marriage, according to the Idaho Falls Post Register.

Hall and his lawyer denied none of this. When he gets out of the hoosegow a couple weeks from now, he joins Ex-Senator Larry Craig in the unemployment line. And the Idaho Hall of Shame.
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Coach Sally Mangina? Dr. Dick Chopp, urologist? A website of unfortunately named professionals

Check it out here.

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Jack Brummet Self Portrait No. 47

click to enlarge

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An excellent instructional video: "Toward emotional maturity"

A wonderful instructional video in which a teenage girl reflects on episodes in which her love, fear, anger were not always under control. She decides not to go "park" with her boyfriend.


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Music video: The Band/Rick Danko's awesome lead vocals on It Makes No Difference

In a band with an amazing three lead singers, Rick Danko always held his own. Next to Stage Fright, this is probably my favorite Rick Danko tune, especially when you bring in Garth's horn solo...



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Poem: The Moon's In Tune

A parchment full moon
In a pale fog aurora
Struggles to clear the mountaintops tonight

The Sea of Tranquility
Flowers in the center
The moon's in tune

She leads the wolves in song
And turns the tide
Of earth's one great ocean

Down here we cured
Polio smallpox and Hitler
But we couldn't save the Dodo.
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A boy and his dog: Jack Brummet and Slugger

circa about 1955 - click to enlarge

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